Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Past Lives?

Not that I find any convincing evidence for a belief in them, but the quiz is so very easy to take...

Wil's Past Lives

415 BC: A prostitute

901 AD: A soldier

1661 AD: A composer

'What were you in your past lives?' at

Thanks (blame?) to Shelly: Cyber Chocolate: Too Funny

MEME: Wednesday Mind Hump -- Remotely Yours

Greetings everyone! Ready for a mind hump? Today is Treaty Day - no fun at all! So I'll take Da King's (from the shoutbox) suggestion and go with tomorrow's theme, Remote Control Day:

1. What are your favorite TV shows? If you can, also tell us the one show you absolutely HATE to miss.
Currently, it's House on Fox. One I hate to miss is Discovery's Deadliest Catch.
2. Who handles the remote control in your household?
I do. According to SWMBO, it's more a case of man-handling, or mishandling the device...
3. How many remote controls are there in your house? Not counting your childrens' appliances.
Too many – a dozen? More?
4. Do you flip through the channels mindlessly, or do you stick with one or two channels?
Depends – am I watching entertainment content or are there commercials on? “Both” would have to be my answer.
5. Adam Sandler's latest movie is "Click," about a guy who discovers a remote control that works on life. If you could have such a device, how would you put it to use?
My life is already as fubared as it needs to be. It doesn't need a steenken remote to go messing with it more.

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've humped. Be sure your hump is linked back to so others can hump too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to hump right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Wednesday Mind Hump you can hump on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-loving mememeister wishing you a happy hump day!

Now That's An Arrival...

or, Damn,-I-wish-I-wrote-that (which I learned about by reading this guy who was similarly impressed with this bit of prose):

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Gut Rumbles No More

The blogosphere lost one of it's stalwarts yesterday. Robert Smith, better known as "Acidman" or just plain "Rob" to his readers, was found dead at home by his daughter, Sam. Rob had blogged for several years and had a loyal following of hecklers and like-minded curmudgeons and curmudgeonettes. He was 54. I will miss his clear-eyed take on the circus of life.

Now the pain that has tormented him, both physically and mentally for so many years has ceased.

Gut Rumbles

July 2 - edited to relocate the photo to a new server.

Monday, June 26, 2006

MEME: Monday Photo Fun in de Sun Madness

Otto, as is her wont, was heard to say in this week's email:
Hi Everyone!

This week's questions are now posted for Monday Madness. It's all about
photography. Have fun and have a great week! As always, I thank each
and every one of you for playing my meme! =)

~Otto (aka Natalie)

1. Do you own a digital camera? Yes, it's a Fujifilm S-5000 4 megapixel with a nice 10X optical zoom lens.
2. What is your camera of choice? I still love my Minolta SRT's SLR 35mm
3. If you're a digital camera fan, do you print your own photos, or do you send them in to be printed? If you send them in, do you have a favorite place? Print our own from digital. For enlargements, I use Webshots.
4. How many pictures do you take a month? Hundreds in the summertime, next to none in winter.
5. How many of those pictures actually get printed? Maybe 1 in 30, if I'm lucky. I'm picky.
6. Are you planning on purchasing a new camera in the near future? No – can't afford it.
7. CHALLENGE: Go check out
Favorite Five Photos and Foto Pherrets and choose just ONE photo to share.
I like this one by our own meme mistress, Otto K: Sunrise on the Beach - 2

Stay At Home Moms Day -- Monday Music Mambo - Week 105

RFDuck, the mamboing mememeister and all around good egg was heard to chortle as he got all broody on his nest: “Let's mambo! Today is Stay-at-home Moms Day! So get out the kool-aid. make some PBJ sandwiches (no crusts allowed!) and answer the following:”

1. Name some musicians whose mothers you'd just love to meet.
Let's see... the loins that produced Jon Bon Jovi must have been quite beautiful in her day, don't you think? And then there's be Alanis Morrisette's mother, and Joni Mitchell's mom, and Mimi Fariña and Joan Baez's mom must have been a dark eyed latin beauty...
2. If you're a stay-at-home mom, what music keeps you sane? If you're not a stay-at-home mom, which album would you give such a mom to help her relax during the day?

Back when I was a SAHD, I started the day off at 6:30 AM with the stereo (you remember what that is, don't you?) set to go off at high volume to a cassette tape that featured Jethro Tull's Bungle In The Jungle and followed up with Aqualung, just to stir the kids' and pop's blood to the starting gate. Breakfast music would be whatever Robert J. Lurtsema¹All Things Considered and Maine Things Considered as I prepared dinner. After the allowed two hours of prime time programming, kids were off to bed and I would be well into my cups. My wife would have already finished the dishes and retired with a book if she wasn't in the middle of a big print job at home, so evening fare would be something quiet, folksy, or classical. Then rinse, wash, repeat.

¹ Robert J.'s signed portrait overlooks my desk to this day from it's place of honor over the window beside my desk.

Well, that's all I can think of for SAHM-related topics! So let's also do a little playlist.

Five songs that help you beat the heat:Summer In The City – The Lovin' Spoonful version, unless it's really hot, then

In The Summertime -- Mungo Jerry's version

Rocky Mountain High -- John Denver

Margaritaville -- Jimmy Buffett

You Are The Sunshine of My Life – Stevie Wonder

Have a good week, my mamboing friends. And remember, be careful out there. Wear a hat. Sunscreen, Drink lots of whiskey. Make love in the cool of the shade down by the old mill stream...

Post your answers here at the World Headquarters for Ku Klux Klan sheets and towels – if anyone needs to lighten up – they do.

That's all for this week!

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #117: Chores You Hate

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #117: Chores You Hate

Why is this trash can trying to eat my head? Perhaps as a reaction to this week's Weekend Assignment:

Weekend Assignment #117: We all have to do chores around the house. Which chore do you like to do the least?

Extra Credit: Do you recycle?

Dear John,

I cook, I chauffeur, I even change babies. I walk dogs, clip toe nails and express anal glands. I castrate hogs, kill rabbits and chickens and clean them for kitchen use. I can butcher a hog or steer. I can kill, cut and wrap four sheep in a day by myself with only a steel-pipe tripod and a few knives to work with.

Just don't ask me to do the dishes ... or empty the god damn litter box, either.


Postus scriptous: We have “forced recycling” here. I hates it. Yes, yes I do, Precious. It costs me tax monies I can ill afford to do something that should be voluntary in this great, profligate, waste-not-want-not, throw-away society.

MEME: Sunday Seven - Episode 43

How much do you surf through the web's top destinations? A site called has ranked the 100 best websites in a variety of categories. We'll use their rankings for this week's edition of the Sunday Seven.

But first, Carly, of " Ellipsis...Suddenly Carly ," was first to play last week! Congratulations Carly!

On to your challenge -- and you might not have seven answers this time around!

Beginning with the top 10 websites as listed by, list the websites from that list that you visit most often. If there aren't seven sites in their top 10 that you feel you visit enough to list, continue on to their next set of 10, and on, until you either fill 7 slots or run out of their rankings.

My answer: Oddly enough, I visit CNET frequently, then Amazon, ZDNet, and eBay. CNN and IMDB less frequently, but still a couple times a week, then WebMD and NPR once in a while, with Consumer Reports the last I visit with any regularity out of the Top 100.

Ten. So sue me, Patrick. [smile]

Sunday, June 25, 2006

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 115

Note: The quiz listed in question #4 featured a link to an old quiz. The link has been corrected, so if you'd like to update your responses, the new quiz is present. Sorry for the confusion.

I saw a preview trailer for the movie "Click" with Adam Sandler. Though the movie itself probably isn't one I'd see, it did inspire one of this week's questions!

But first, Cat of "Sweet Memes" was first to play last week's set of questions. Congratulations, Cat!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. You are given a "remote control" that involves life itself. Of these functions, which would you think you'd make the most use of: fast-forward, rewind, or pause?
Given my propensity for “foot-in-mouth disease,” I suspect the rewind button might be the first to wear out...
2. If you could use a "change channel" button to become a totally different person, would you do so?
If I could be assured the new me would be a kinder, gentler, Christian version, I do believe I'd choose the “off” button...

3. Do you own a gun? If not, what would it take for you to purchase one?
I am a former card-carrying member of the NRA and used to qualify each year on the pistol range for my work. What do you think?
4. Take the quiz:
What piercing are you?

Take the quiz:
What piercing are you?

You are boring! the ear piercing is the most common piercing and is not very daring!

Quizzes by -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!

5. Would you ever get a piercing described in your answer to the previous question?

I've toyed mentally over the years with the notion of piercing an ear, pirate style, but I can never remember which ear is pierced if you are straight, and then there's the whole copy-cat syndrome these days and I already look enough like a pirate with my eyepatch and long hair that no further enhancement is needed.

As far as piercings in general, aside from single piercings in each ear, I did not and would not tolerate an employee displaying piercings while at work. I have fired people over this in the past and would in future. In my line of work, they are a liability and, simply put, dangerous.

6. Do you tend to visit friends and relatives at their homes more or have them visit you in your home more?

I tend to visit away from my home ... when they come here they're the one's doing the “visiting.” My house is a cave with furniture and only safe and comfortable for other trolls and ursines.

Meme: Unconcious Muttering -- Week 177

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Week 177

6 hours, 50 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Newspaper :: old news

  2. Crucify :: hang out to dry

  3. Sausage :: Anduille

  4. Handy :: right

  5. Cloak :: dagger

  6. Drunk :: pissed

  7. Fuel :: oil

  8. Caress :: wife

  9. Itch :: scratch

  10. Vehicle :: Honda

You may play along if you like – sign up for the notification list, post a link to your answers and see how others respond by clicking on the links above or below. Ciao, baby!

Friday, June 23, 2006

What Breed of Puppy Are You?

You can blame this on Anna - I went and checked out a quiz she'd referred to in this post and discovered one I liked even more:

You Are a German Shepherd Puppy

Intelligent, quick witted, and a bit aggressive.

You've got the jaw power to take a bite out of anyone you choose.

Time To Save NPR and PBS (again) Civic Action: Save NPR and PBS (again):

Everyone expected House Republicans to give up efforts to kill NPR and PBS after a massive public outcry stopped them last year. But they've just voted to eliminate funding for NPR and PBS—unbelievably, starting with programs like 'Sesame Street.'

Public broadcasting would lose nearly a quarter of its federal funding this year. Even worse, all funding would be eliminated in two years--threatening one of the last remaining sources of watchdog journalism.

Sign the petition telling Congress to save NPR and PBS again this year:

Last year, millions of us took action to save NPR and PBS, and Congress listened. We can do it again if enough of us sign the petition in time.

This would be the most severe cut in the history of public broadcasting. The Boston Globe reports the cuts 'could force the elimination of some popular PBS and NPR programs.' NPR's president expects rural public radio stations may be forced to shut down.

The House and Senate are deciding if public broadcasting will survive, and they need to hear from viewers like you. Sign the petition at:


And before you go jumping up and down about liberal bias, buddies, consider this -- YOUR CongressCritter and mine have a hard-on for NPR/PBS because they screwed up about 40 years ago and allowed the Corporation For Public Broadcasting to purchase programming from outside sources. Sources like the Children's Television Workshop (CTW) -- the ones who produce Sesame Street. CTW makes a lot of money on the syndication and product spin-offs of Sesame Street and it's characters and it pisses them off that they can't get their fingers into that pie.

Now, I don't live and die by either All Things Considered or The MacNeil-Lehrer Report the way some of my liberal acquaintances do, but I appreciate the overall intelligence of the reporting and the fact they aren't afraid to allow the expression of opinions the news producers don't particularly favor. Try finding a genuine contrary opinion at Fox News or CNN...

AtomFilms - Dog Years 2

AtomFilms - Dog Years 2

is a cute continuation of the series and well worth the viewing. Not really suitable for young children due to discussion of impacted anal glands and the like... LOL

Thursday, June 22, 2006


Oddly Enough News Article | "Worker flicks wrong switch, costs Nova $11 million"

Logical inconsistencies...

The Quest For Bacon: Thrust Into The World With Apple Eyes: "Unless you think Ford is better than Chevy because they baptize their engine parts in holy water. Then we're okay. That's consistency."

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

I feel the need to make mary paintings...

We Feel Fine / by Jonathan Harris and Sepandar Kamvar: "An exploration of human emotion, in six movements by Jonathan Harris and Sepandar Kamvar" -- This is fun. Explore real-time emotions as the appear on the web, sort by age group, keyword, weather, country, etc.

Via Evhead

Wednesday Mind Hump -- Less Is More

BlogdriveInsanity: "Wednesday Mind Hump

Hello all you humpers! It's time to do another Wednesday Mind Hump. Today is Less Is More Day, so today's question is simply:


Not much. Groovin' to the sounds on this podcast. Check it out...

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

John Scalzi's Your Monday Photo Shoot: Still Life

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Still Life Take a snap of something in a "still life" mode. It doesn't have to be a bowl of fruit, mind you (although there's nothing wrong with a bowl of fruit, if that's your thing). But something that you can get contemplative about would be nice. Also, it doesn't move, unless you go and pick it up.

Still Life ... With Garbage.

 Posted by Picasa

Monday, June 19, 2006

Monday Music Mambo - Week 104

Taking a moment from his preening, RFDUCK was heard to softly quack, “Hi everyone! I hope you all had a good weekend. Today is Juneteenth Day, but as usual I don't know how that relates to music. So instead of that theme, I'm going to do something a bit unusual. We're putting together a band, but the band members are going to be historical figures!

The lead singer must be a former U.S. President
The lead guitar player must be a famous author
The bass player must be a scientist
The drummer must be a famous criminal. Because, drummers are . . well, you know how they are.
If you want to add a rhythm guitar player or keyboard player too,
choose a retired and/or dead baseball player.

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to so others can dance too.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!”

Allow me to introduce you to the band -- On drums, direct from London, lost in a fog, we have Jack Z. Ripper! On bass, laying down that cool, California-style bottom while sitting on his bottom is none other than Stephen Hawking! Driving us like a home run knocked clear over the “Green Monster”, timeless Ted Williams on keyboards. Picking out the melody for all to thrive on as we jive on, your friend and mine, William “The Bard” Shakespeare! And finally, give it up for The Man, leader of the pack, jack of all trades, all-around genius and architect of our sound, Thomas Jefferson!!! Let's hear it for... “T.J. And The Deadbeats” - Yay!!!

It's times like this, when I can see a picture (collage, actually) in my mind of the personalities that go into making this band a “reality” that I want to scream and shout at the heavens and blame my absolute jackassery of talentless manipulation of icons, color, light and shadow I know as “Art” on my mother's shortcomings. But of course, it is my shortcoming, not hers, that renders me artistically impotent.

Have a good week, y'all.

MEME: Monday Madness

Miz Otto took time out from her spring planting (delayed by all the rain, don'tcha know) to tell us about the Monday Madness: “This week's questions come from one of our fellow players, tricia! Thank you Tricia, for your fabulous questions. Look for more from Tricia in the upcoming weeks. Thanks to everyone for playing, and have a great week! =)”

1. How many cop shows can you name? Miami Vice, NYPD Blue, Hill Street Blues, Peter Gunn, Nash Bridges Walker: Texas Ranger, the whole Law & Order franchise, NCIS, Homicide: Life On The Street, The Streets of San Francisco, Andy Griffeth, Cops, Gunsmoke, Forever Knight, and others whose titles will come to me in a few minutes...
2. Do you send text messages? Only if you stretch the definition currently in vogue to include blog entries and the rare IM...
3. If you could be on a game show (current or old), which one would you be on and why? Lingo – I like the boobies on the co-host, (no, not Chuck Woolery) Shandi Finnessey.
4. What are some of your favorite websites? , Google and Ask Jeeves , and the Bangor Daily News. Then there's NRS, L. L. Bean, REI, Cabelas, and other shopping sites specific to my personal areas of interest. (Kinky Cards, anyone?)
5. What are your favorite things about the internet? The near instantaneous access to information, the sense of community it has engendered for shut-ins like me and the reduction in the size of the planet to a comprehensible size. Oddly enough, they're also my chief complaints about the internet, too.
6. What about least favorite? See above.
7. What are some good ways to deal with a pet loss?
Run in circles, scream and shout; sit right down and begin to pout... oh, my, you expected helpful suggestions? Make a wanted poster, copy it many times and plaster your neighborhood with a blizzard of them, “chip” your pet (if appropriate – obviously a problem with a pet giraffe if you “chip” it at the base of the skull, for instance) when you first get them, tattoo an identification number where a vet or animal care worker will notice it, call your local animal welfare agencies and inform them of your loss and contact information, go out hunting for your wayward marsupial and be patient – these things often take time.

So you want to play along? Then a visit to Mistress Otto at her Pleasure Dome of Pain would be in order.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

MEME -- Unconscious Mutterings -- Week 176

LunaNiñ | Unconscious Mutterings: "Week 176
2 hours, 46 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?"

1. Voice :: coach
2. Us :: Them
3. Passionately :: held beliefs
4. Humbly :: meekly
5. Love songs :: dirges
6. Dim :: light
7. Calendar :: tempus fugits
8. Careless :: matches
9. Block :: fooootball
10. Goal :: score!

Saturday, June 17, 2006

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #116: The Things We Share With Dad

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #116: The Things We Share With Dad

Whoa, Father's Day is this Sunday -- And I am so looking forward to my tie! -- and so let's make this a Father's Day-themed Weekend Assignment:

Weekend Assignment #116: Tell about some personality trait or quirk you got from your father -- or, if you're a father, some personality trait or quirk of yours you see in your kids.

Extra credit: Did you ever get dad a tie for Father's Day?

I obtained my facility with words, such as it is, from my father. My snoring, loud enough to wake an entire floor in a motel (really), was a gift of my pater. I am, much to my chagrin, just as much of a political troglodyte as he was. My iron will and integrity come from him, too. The ability to kill other humans in cold blood comes from my mother and her Irish ancestors...

While I gave my father some ties back in the day, some of which I wear proudly now, they were more often reserved for his birthday which fell a week after Father's Day. This Hallmark greeting day was reserved for gag jokes. Whoopee cushions, joy buzzers, rubber chickens and the like made their appearances on this day. Often, in our teen years, my brothers and I would cook up some cockamamie skit to entertain him. Generally, the old man would sleep in and we'd sit down to a big brunch prepared by yours truly and my kitchen minions, the gruesome twosome siblings.

Regardless, I miss the old bastard and wish he was still here to annoy the crap out of me...

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 114

This edition of the "Saturday Six" returns to the more normal, random questions you've come to know and love.

But first, for the second week in a row, Carly of "Ellipsis...Suddenly Carly was first to play! Congratulations again, Carly!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. What vegetable can you not get enough of? What vegetable that you've actually tried cooking do you hate, no matter what is done to it?
I adore sweet corn on the cob. Can't get enough of it. Such a short season here in Maine, too.

Hate is a pretty strong word. Vegetables, while living, are classified as inanimate in my lexicon and therefore are incapable of being hated, as they can not hate back. So, while there are some I won't go out of my way to prepare, I don't actually hate rutabagas, for instance. I'm just not fond of them...
2. Have you ever given your father one of those tacky flashing ties as a Father's Day gift? What's the "worst" gift you've ever given your dad?
My father passed from this mortal coil never having experienced the joy of flashing ties. Possibly the worst gift I ever gave him was a “glass froster.” It consisted of a cardboard tube, closed at one end, covered in an obviously fake alligator hide print vinyl with a brass grommeted hole in the top of the cover, which allowed the nozzle of a can of compressed freon gas to protrude therefrom. You took a glass you wanted to frost and inverted it over the cardboard tube, pushing down until the grommet had depressed the nozzle sufficiently to engage the valve. Freon gas filled the cup, chilling the glass. The chilled glass surface temperature was sufficiently lower than the dew point of the ambient air, resulting in condensation which then froze onto the surface of the glass. Voila! Frosted glass. At least until you actually poured a liquid into the glass, undoing all of your previous hard work...
3. When is the last time you donated clothes to a charity drive? If you had to guess, what percentage of the clothes in your closet right now no longer fit?

Last year, if memory serves. I'd guess about 30%, but they are all things I'll hold onto just “in case” I ever lose enough weight to wear them again (leather vests, suits, Scottish Herringbone tweed wool sport coats from the Outer Hebrides, Irish Fisherman's sweater (from Ireland), etc.
4. Take the quiz: Where should you spend your summer vacation?

You Should Spend Your Summer in the Mountains

You're quiet, introspective, and a great thinker.
You need a summer vacation that gets you away from the crowds and the heat.
So retreat to the mountains, where you can clear your head.

Where Should You Spend Your Summer?

5. If you could spend one week anywhere in the world or two weeks at home relaxing, which would you choose?
I'd take a cruise up the Inside Passage from Vancouver, BC to Ketchikan, Alaska.
6. Do you tend to be more of a morning person or a night owl? If you could, would you become the opposite?
I'm a night owl. I tried for almost 20 years to squeeze my square peg ass into the ridiculous sphincter of the business world. I failed, utterly. But I miss having an income. Boy, do I miss that...

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

David Attenborough: The Lyrebird

DevilDucky - David Attenborough: The Lyrebird: "In April 2006, to celebrate naturalist David Attenborough's 80th birthday, the public were asked to vote on their favourite of his television moments. This clip of the lyrebird was voted number one. A Lyrebird is either of two species of ground-dwelling Australian birds, most notable for their extraordinary ability to mimic natural and artificial sounds from their environment."

via BoingBoing

MTV & AOL -- Gnarls Barkley -- Crazy (video/quicktime Object)

MTV Awards - Gnarls Barkley -- StarWars Crazy

(broadband suggested for both)

Moonlit Fog

John Scalzi's Your Monday Photo Shoot: Bad Photos (That Are Still Kind of Cool)

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Find a picture in your files that is technically bad, but is still interesting to look at. By "technically bad," I mean things like people are partly out of frame, your subject is out of focus, everyone has red eye, people's heads are cut off, there are in appropriate blurs, so on an so forth. But even so, it's still an interesting picture to look at.

Moon light reflecting off the fog over the back field around 3:30 this morning. The mistakes were holding the camera by hand and forgetting how slow (ISO) it is. This is a slightly edited image to increase the contrast and brightness level. Click on the thumbnail to see it without editing.

Free Image Hosting at

Monday Music Mambo - Week 103

Happy Monday, everyone! Ready for another mambo? Today should be interesting - it's History Repeats Day.

1. Name your three favorite cover songs.
Jeff Buckley's cover of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah, Johnny Cash and Willy Nelson's covers of Cohen's Bird On The Wire, and Judy Collins' cover of Suzanne, also by Cohen.
2. What's one artist, concert or musical era that you'd like to have been alive to see, or see again if you saw it in the past?
I'd like to have been in Vienna the seven season the Mozart was in residence.
3. What's one history lesson that you think a certain band or musician, or all musicians, should quit repeating?
Y'all will never be as famous as The Beatles ... just get over it.
4. Name a band that's not together anymore (members can be alive or dead) that you would absolutely love to see reform.
The Fugs.

Gratuitous fine print, wherein you sign over parental rights to your first born, amongst other things:

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!

Monday Madness Drew A Blank

Otto let fly with “Let's do some more fill-in-the-blanks this week! =) Thanks for playing Monday Madness, all of my faithful participants!”

Oh boy!

1. I have a picture of _the revolving Webshots daily images_ on my computer desktop.
2. There are _seven_ pictures hanging on my living room walls.
3. My big goal for this week is to _get the A/C fixed in the car_.
4. I plan to visit _hundreds of_ blogs this week.
5. The weather we're having right now is _rather gray and damp – it's raining_.
6. I really should _get out_ more often.

Play along if you like – just visit Otto at the World Monday Madness HQ & Beauty Shoppe to leave a link to your answers.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #115: Make Your Own Highway Sign

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #115: Make Your Own Highway Sign

I'm feeling in the mood of a little silliness, aren't you? So let's make this a fun and simple Weekend Assignment:

Weekend Assignment #115: You'll find an online highway sign generator here. Go there, write your own highway sign, and post it in your Journal or Blog. If you're not sure how to get the picture from the site to your computer, it's simple: right click on your mouse and use the "Save Picture As..." command. That should allow you to save it on your computer. The picture downloads as a 640x480 picture, so before you upload you might want to shrink it a little (I shrank mine so it was 450 pixels across). Also, remember AOL's Terms of Service (i.e., keep the language this side of profane, please).

Extra Credit: What was the worst traffic jam you've ever been in?

One of the worst traffic jams I've ever been in was the Sunday after Thanksgiving, 1968, on the one mile exit ramp from the New York Thruway onto the Northway in Albany, New York. It was late afternoon and dusk comes early that time of year. A Volkswagon Beetle with two college kids had sped up the ramp and lost control at the top where the traffic from the southbound Thruway lanes to the Northway merge before the toll booths; the bug skidded and swerved, blew a tire and finally flipped over onto its roof, strewing luggage and possessions over two lanes plus the breakdown lane and brought eight lanes of traffic to a halt for over two hours as the extricated the passenger from the twisted wreckage. Some 8000 cars and the drivers and passengers were inconvenienced as fire engines, ambulances and state troopers first converged upon and then took control of the scene. Cars were allowed through the accident scene one at a time in each direction. I know – I was the driver of the Volkswagon ...

Saturday Six - Episode 113

Saturday Six - Episode 113

This week's edition of the "Saturday Six" will be a little different. All six questions begin with one act on your part. You'll need to take a step outside your front door and have a quick look around. The answers to the questions will relate to what you see. You can go ahead and read the questions first, just so you'll know what you're looking for, or stay inside and look out from a front window if you prefer.

But first, it was Carly of "Ellipsis...Suddenly Carly" who was first to play! Congratulations, Carly!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

From your front door...
1. What is the color of the first vehicle you spot?
2. Is this the last vehicle you drove? If not, does this car belong to you or someone in your home?
Yes. See the photo below from this afternoon.
3. What kind of tree is closest to your front door?
Jack Pine we received one spring from our neighbor across the street (he was an IP forester at the time). It's now almost 30 feet tall.
4. What's the weather like at the time you answer these questions? Did you feel any dramatic change of temperature or humidity as you stepped outside of your home?
At 9:45 PM it's 56 degrees and raining. It's been within 10 degrees of that mark since Tuesday and rained the entire time.
5. Of your immediate neighbors -- those whose homes you can see from your front door -- how many of them do you know by name?
The front door faces the dooryard, or “driveway” as some call it. I can look left and see the neighbors across the street whom I am on speaking terms with. The only other neighbor I know is a quarter mile to the north of here and is a widower. None of the rest are known to me.
6. How many of those do you speak to when you see them?

I only ever speak to the folks across the street. Here it is a case of live and let live as it's too expensive to erect fences. Besides, I can't be a recluse and a curmudgeon if I'm off gallivanting around the neighborhood...

Rain, Rain, Go Away...

It gives the appearance of a possible reenactment of the Biblical flood that had Noah building boats in the rain. Two weeks of rain and counting. Only one day without rain in that entire time period and we haven't been hit anywhere near as bad as southern Maine and New Hampshire and northeastern Massachusetts.

My first act in the morning is to empty the bucket next to the monitor on the computer desk ... then, and only then can I take a pee myself. The black fungus growing in and on the wall is a half inch thick. The lawn is a foot and a half high as Momma can't stand to get her face wet so there's no lawn mowing.

My allergies are kicking – bad enough the pulmonologist expressed concern for my short-term longevity the other morning after we'd both sloshed into his office from the parking lot in a minor monsoon. (I'd tried to use the valet parking, but the driver had balked when he saw an inch of floodwater sloshing around the floor well of the front seat). Breathing from the bottom of my right lobe is a distant memory. I can only imagine how awful the crap is that's growing in there.

Oh! The weatherdrone on the TV said there's no end in sight. “Possibly some partial sun peeking between the clouds on Tuesday.” Then back to the discussion of daily and total accumulations of rainfall from this “weather event”! “Weather event,” my ass. It's a fucking monsoon. More evidence the pinheads in the white coats aren't wrong about “global warming” (a misnomer and a term I have come to hate as the disbelievers latch onto it for ridicule and scorn). Let's just say the weather patterns are shifting due to the crap mankind has been excreting to the atmosphere for the past two hundred years. Sky shit, Rob. Got it?

Even the cats are disgusted. Each afternoon, as I make the necessary offerings to their food bowl in order to assure safe passage of me and the missus to the car, they attempt to rub their soggy selves on her uniform. This elicits squeals of disgust as she attempts to avoid their ministrations (admittedly, clumps of yellow fir and burdocks show up quite clearly on navy blue pants). They all look at me as if it's my fault that it's too wet to get off the porch.

Anyway, I'm tired of all the water. We've had more rain in two weeks than we normally see in two months and this is almost as soggy a place as Seattle. Time to get one of those new-fangled raincoats that let you sweat while staying dry.

"Lake 2006" -- Ten Paces From The Door Posted by Picasa

Quiz -- Nah, Not Me...

Are You Normal? - A Fun Personality Quiz

Tough Tabby

AOL News - Tabby Cat Chases Bear Up Tree, Twice

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Wednesday Mind Hump -- Cinema Blogatus

Wednesday Mind Hump

Despite other distractions, rfduck, mememeister du jour, was understood to say, “Hello humpers! Today we're going to talk about movies.”

1. What is your favorite

Comedy? Pretty Woman
Drama? Philadelphia
Action flick? It's a toss-up between Twister! and The Perfect Storm.

2. What is your favorite performance by an actor or actress in a movie? Jimmy Stewart in Harvey

3. How many movies do you own? Probably just over 100, divided pretty evenly between VHS tapes and DVD's.

4. Do you prefer the theater or waiting for the DVD? I prefer the DVD for most movies.

Until next time, this is your music-loving mememeister wishing you a happy hump day!

Good Question, Indeed

Got this fromLL at Curses and Chrome, who got it from Smitten Kitten:

Tuesday, June 06, 2006


Memorial Day 2006

A fascinating fairy tale for your delectation. Once upon a time, a writer who employed the AOL Journals pseudonym lotzamoe would regale the blogverse with tales of his adventures with his coworker “Rick” and his insane receptionist and other amusing anecdotes and characters. He was acerbic, intelligent and oh, so personable a writer. Too bad he didn't use a better password. His wife put the finishing touches on his AOL Journals career today with this special Memorial Day entry;

Monday, May 29, 2006
11:30:00 AM EDT
Feeling Sad

Today is for REAL hero's

“Some people ride on the glory of others and claim to be the real thing. Here's a story for you. Fifteen years ago a man said that he was in the Special Forces, had more medals than his uniform could hold and was coming back from war at that time. He was quite the officer and a gentleman. His stories of war were fantabulous. I worshipped the ground he walked on. During those years he never held a job for more than a couple of months. I supported him. That man, my husband the author of this journal will no longer be writing. He left in December, saying that he was seconded in the Army. None of his stories are true. After not hearing from him I checked with the Army. He hadn't been in since being a teenager. They had released him with a less than Honorable discharge. He actually had moved to Carbondale Illinois with the book keeper and her 4 kids. He had met her here in J-Land. His clients,the children and I are just now finding out about all the lies and affairs. I can't say to much because of the many lawsuits. He was the only one that I knew in the Army and that isn't even true. So my Memorial day Thank You goes to the men and women that serve our country .My husband isn't a hero but I'm sure he is telling somebody today that he is. God bless the Real Hero's.”

Now, isn't THAT special?


UPDATE June 6, 2006: Mrs. Linklater's Guide To The Universe has more of the story in an entry she calls Speaking of Nincompoops...

Monday Music Mambo - Week 102 - World Environment Day

Rfduck, the music-loving mememeister, has gone off and gotten jiggy with those wahoos of the environmental left. See for yourself:

“Hi everyone! Another week is here, and with it comes another Monday Music Mambo. Today is World Environment Day. What I want you to do today is give me a song or artist related to each of the basic world elements:”

And what I have done is give songs that have been sung by Jerry Garcia that address each of the quaternaries of the world, because I'm in a Jerry Garcia state of mind:

Fire – Fire On The Mountain by Robert Hunter & Mickey Hart, modified lyrics by Jerry Garcia

Water – Off To Sea Once More traditional, sung by Jerry on the Shady Grove album

EarthSave Mother Earth by M Saunders, E Lewis, Played by Jerry Garcia with Merl Saunders in the early 1970s

Sky – Ghost Riders In The Sky by Stan Jones Played by Jerry Garcia at a studio session in Novato on August 21, 1971

Finding one for water was kinda difficult – Jerry was a sky pilot and an earth sprite but never a water witch.

“If that's not enough for you, give me a few songs about things that destroy the environment.” So sayeth rfduck...

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes -- Jerome Kern and Otto Harback

Oil On Water – Raspberry Silk

There you have my choices. Click the link below to play along and have a good week, everybody... stay cool.
The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!

Fire On The Mountain

Lyrics: Robert Hunter
Music: Mickey Hart

Long distance runner, what you standin' there for?
Get up, get out, get out of the door
You're playin' cold music on the barroom floor
Drowned in your laughter and dead to the core.
Theres a dragon with matches thats loose on the town
Takes a whole pail of water just to cool him down.

Fire! fire on the mountain!
Fire, fire on the mountain
Fire, fire on the mountain
Fire, fire on the mountain

Almost ablaze still you don't feel the heat
It takes all you got just to stay on the beat.
You say its a livin', we all gotta eat
But you're here alone, theres no one to compete.
If mercy's a business, I wish it for you
More than just ashes when your dreams come true.


Long distance runner, what you holdin' out for?
Caught in slow motion in a dash for the door.
The flame from your stage has now spread to the floor
You gave all you had. why you wanna give more?
The more that you give, the more it will take
To the thin line beyond which you really cant fake.


Robert Hunter wrote two additional verses that the Grateful Dead never performed

Baby's in scarlet, her shackles in gray
If loves to love she's got it salted away
Out of the rat trap and under the wire
Out of the frying pan and into the fire
Put it down heavy, strip it down lean
Got to lay it down dirty and play it back clean

Fireman, fireman, call off your dog
This isn't a blaze, it's just a hog in the log
Cut up in sections, squirming alive
Lost to the world on that fifty-cent jive
There's a fire on the mountain, running around
What doesn't go up can never come down

Mickey Hart recorded this as a rap-type studio version ages ago, and now performs a similar version with Mystery Box and The Other Ones. These include yet another verse:

Wound in barbed wire, hell I ain't sore
Only hurts when I laugh, or roll on the floor
Only hurts a little, at least that's what I'm told
When you drown in hot oil it can even feel cold
I know I'm in love but I can't tell you why
It feels like poison, shoot me down when I cry

He also mixes around the additional Hunter verses, and adds one further couplet:

Gonna drink a hot water before I die
It cools me down, I ain't telling no lie

Hunter sang a version with the Dinosaurs in January 1984 which again mixes around the order of the couplets, and includes an additional opening verse - partly ad-libbed:

I asked my mother for fifteen cents
To see this Italian fella jump the fence
He jumped so high [fell] on the [grass]
Ever see an Italian French fry, yes, yes, yes

Monday, June 05, 2006

MEME: Monday Madness – Medical Mayhem

Monday Madness Banner - click to use live link
Otto got to partying a wee bit too hearty over the Memorial Day weekend last week and was just a wee bit slow at putting up last week's questions. She's 'Johnnie on the spot' this week, though, while your humble correspondent and barefoot houseboy has been caught in the pantry with the upstairs maid getting low down and dirty. Fortunately, it was Miz Otto's “Fluffer-doodle” that caught Mme. Fifi and me in such a compromising position.

Miss Otto was heard to utter whilst in the throes of passion, “I apologize for posting last week's challenge so late. To everyone who participates in this meme, I thank you! And now for this week's Monday Madness...”

1. I have broken many small bones bones in my lifetime.
2. I have had to get a lot of stitches.
3. The worst I've ever injured myself was when I fell while rock climbing.
4. I've had to go to the Emergency room dozens of times.
5. On a scale of 1 (being the highest) to 10 (being the lowest), my pain tolerance is a diminishing target – I used to be a 1 but I'm down to a 3 these days and sliding fast.

You can get on the notification list, snag some cool graphics and just play along with the rest of us just by visiting the Monday Madness World Headquarters and Ye Olde Bowling Ball Bufferie.

MEME: Sunday Seven - Episode 40

Name seven television show themes -- current or classic -- that tend to stick in your head once you hear them.

  1. Peter Gunn

  2. M.A.S.H.

  3. Walt Disney Show

  4. Flintstones

  5. Sopranos

  6. Bonanza

  7. Miami Vice

If you want to play along, visit Patrick's Weekender (just click the banner above) and find out all about the rules of play. Come on, it's fun!

What Would Elvis Do?

Cap'n Dyke, Pirate Queen & Rogue Blogger: "From 'Internet Infidels': Jesus vs. Elvis

The similarities between Jesus Christ and Elvis Presley are almost uncanny. Just check the following parallels for yourself!"

* Jesus said "Love thy neighbor." Elvis said "Don't be cruel."

* Jesus is the Lord's shepherd. Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd.

* Jesus was part of the Trinity. Elvis' first band was a trio...

See the rest here.

Via Cap'n Dyke, Pirate Queen & Rogue Blogger

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Unconcious Mutterings -- Week 174

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Fraud :: flim-flam man
  2. Cure :: cancer
  3. Slate :: blackboard
  4. Pretentious :: prig
  5. Splendid :: morning
  6. Geek :: nerd
  7. Blister :: boots
  8. Pizza :: frescatta
  9. Revive :: Heimlich
  10. Visionary :: Seer
So you want to play along, do you? Then get that fat cursor of yours over to La Luna Niña's place and sign up for her notification list.

Meme: Weekend Assignment #114 -- SOBRIETY

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #114: Things You Like Now But Not Then

As we go on in life, we find things we didn't like when we young we develop an affinity for as we get older. With that in mind, here's your Weekend Assignment:

Weekend Assignment #114: Name a thing you like today, that your younger self would probably roll his or her eyes at. People, places, things, ideas, philosophies -- all of it is up for consideration.

“Pick a thing you didn't like earlier in your life that you have an appreciation for now.

Write about it in your blog or journal and then come back and leave a link here. It'll be fun.”

Extra Credit: Name something you didn't like then that you still don't like now.

Dear John,

Hope the Creeping Con Crud has loosened its grip and you are feeling more, shall we say, normal. If not, there's always a raw egg milk shake with cayenne pepper -=- that'll either cure what ails you, or give you something to be really sick about, heheheh.

My topic for this week's assignment is “Sobriety.” Back when I was a young man, from the time of my mother's death onward, a sober moment was a moment I should have spent stoned. It's a sordid story, which I am sure you'll find edifying...

When I was a young man, a much younger man than you, I was also sent off to a boarding school for an education. In my case, it produced an educated prig. Yep, a red, white and blue, Wall Street Journal reading, William F. Buckley, Jr. spouting, A-Number 1-sshole. No new ideas need apply. My initial college days were a blur of Young Republican rallies, recruiting dinners with the boys from the company and overtures from the local reps of my high school pal Joe Gallo. I was flying high, supporting the Vietnam War, earning spending money for school with a little wet work here and there.

Then I discovered drugs.

Marijuana, to be specific. Opened up a whole new vista. Gone was the stuffed starched shirt, the old school tie, those ugly gray flannels, that dyed-in-the-wool mindset. Hello munchies. Welcome, Mr. Paranoia. Make yourself comfortable, shit-for-brains. I lost all critical faculties I possessed. At least that was the way it seemed at the time.

I graduated from mary jane to the hard stuff fairly fast. Soon I was swilling 100 proof bourbon whiskey by the fifthful. Eight years of that kind of abuse and I hit rock bottom. My wife left me for a co-worker, my kids hated me, I couldn't hold a job and I was stoned-cold broke. My hands were no longer steady enough to pull a trigger; the company terminated my contract for plumbing services. Even La Cosa Nostra ceased their previously incessant late-night “service calls” in New York and Boston. I was all used up.

In retrospect, I have seen the error of my ways and I am now a card-carrying neo-con; a true member of the Axis of Asshole. Don't let my appearance fool you. I am as conservative as Rush Limbaugh and twice as oily (or should that be “unctuous”?). And, my aim is even better than it was before old Jack and I became drinking buddies. Contracts roll in from the big cities to the south. I am once again in demand up and down the east coast.

I like sobriety – it pays a whole lot better than being stoned.

Give my best to Krissy and Athena. See you in the funny papers. For your sake, I hope that's all you'll ever see of me ...

Ali “Carlos” Akbar

P.S. George Hiram Walker Bush and I share at least one thing in common – neither of us can stomach broccoli!

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Saturday, June 03, 2006

Saturday Six - Episode 112

"Patrick's Weekender" has a new look, and this edition of the "Saturday Six" is the first post since the new look debuted. I hope you like it.

Last week, Wil of "The Daily Snooze was first to play! Congratulations, Wil!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. Have you made any plans for summer vacation? Will rising gas prices have any direct impact on your plans?
No plans as of yet, but I suspect that we'll be sticking pretty close to home unless SWMBO informs me otherwise. ;)
2. What quality do you hope most readers will observe in you through your primary blog?
While it's really nice to have readers, I really do this to exorcise my own personal demons, or, as Pam used to call it, “head noise.” As such, I haven't any expectations as to what readers take away, other than an interesting bit of information or a quiet interlude...
3. What quality do you think you possess that comes through the least effectively through your primary blog?
That I am basically a nice guy.
4. Take the quiz: Who were you in high school?

Brainy Kid

In high school, you were acing AP classes or hanging out in the computer lab. You may have been a bit of a geek back then, but now you're a total success!

Who Were You In High School?

    Actually, I was more the “nerd/social climber” than brainy. And I basically hated high school.

  1. What logo or message is on the last container you drank from? “Thermos”

  2. You find out that a co-worker you consider a close friend is stealing supplies from work. You know that if you tell your boss, your friend will likely be fired. If you began to think that your boss suspected that you might be the person stealing the supplies, would you tell on your friend?

    Probably not – I'm not a “tattle-tale” or “squealer”. I know I am not stealing, so should be able to persuade the Pettybees* of that fact. If not, I suspect there might be many other things wrong with the job that I maybe should look a lot closer at.

    Want to get your own questions and play along? Click the banner above and copy the raw questions right from the horses mouth, so to speak. Tell Patrick that “Wil sent me!”.

    *Pettybees = PTB's – the acronym for “Powers That Be” per Anne McCaffrey.