John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #143: What You'd Want, If You Were a Kid

For this week's Weekend Assignment, I want you get in touch with your inner child -- and give it a gift list: Weekend Assignment #143: Imagine you are a kid today, age 10 or under. What would you want for Christmas/Hanukkah/Seasonal Holiday of Your Preference? Don't look back on the toys of your youth, now -- think about what kids have now that you would want if you were their age. Also if you're a parent, don't ask your kids what they want -- this is supposed to be about what you would want, if you were their age. I love my daughter, but I guarantee you, there are things she wants that if I were a kid her age I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole. Extra Credit: Do you kinda want the same toy now that you're an adult? Come on, you can admit it if you do.

Dear Uncle John,

Momma says you called to say Hi! and wanted to know what I want for xmas? That you and Aunt Krissy wanted to get me something really special? Wow! I asked Santa for a new bicycle and I asked Grammy from a new sweater (because that is what she gets me every xmas, so why rock the boat?). I asked Momma and Dad for a new Lionel train set with real smoke and a whistle that blows and a log loader and an electro-magnet like they have at Electric Boat in New Haven. You know, like you can see from the turnpike?

I didn't tell anyone about the secret thing I want. It's a genuine MS Composite Stinger 6 PRO Almost Ready-To-Fly Fully Tuned Helicopter! You got to see it. It's so kewl! It flies on gas and has a real gas motor and can go really high and do stuff, like spray crops (I think). It uses an R/C control system and it costs a lot of money. I left the catalog in the bathroom where Dad could see it. It was open to the page with the helicopter on it. He came out sputtering about how much it costs to Mom, so I know it's really expensive.

Tell Cousin Athena she can play with my toys when you guys come for the big party next week.

Your favorite nephew,

Billy

P.S. My grumpy old curmudgeon self in the future says “H-e-double golf clubs, yes!” when he contemplated the extra credit question.