Walkies!

Anybody remember Barbara Woodhouse and her gratingly cheerful "Walkies!" command to her dogs? Well, I'm going walkabout for a bit -- a polite way of saying I've entered the doldrums, my sails are slack from the lack of wind and the current is carrying me towards the Tropic of Capricorn at only 2 knots. I'll be back after I enter the "Trades" and get some wind back in my sails. Behave in the meantime -- I should be back after the election sometime.

Please talk about me behind my back and in my absence...

A Great Musical History Find

Are you a Bob Dylan or Johnny Cash fan like I am? You're going to love these outtakes over on
Kwaya Na Kisser: Bob Dylan & Johnny Cash: Studio Outtakes, Johnny Cash Show Jams, 1969.

Via The J Walk Blog.

What if Tom Cruise met Katie Holmes and they had children?

After spending 15 minutes messing with this, I decided to blatently steal it and offer it up to my few readers... but really, all credit goes to Christine (Hi, Chrissy!) at Infinitepink.

The Suri Cruise Halloween Dressup Game!

MEME: Wednesday Mind Hump – Literary Humping

Rfduck has “been to the future on a horse with no name” and finds that it's pretty darn lame: “Hi everyone! I'm back with another mind hump. I'm going to make my own theme today, because I don't like the other theme. So today is Book Day here at the hump!”

1. What are some of your favorite books, and why?
Robert Heinlein's “Time Enough For Love,” “Friday,” and “The Past Through Tomorrow” spring immediately to mind, followed by John Scalzi's “Old Man's War,” Ursula K Leguin's “The Left Hand of Darkness,” and Frank Herbert's “Dune” (as well as the rest of his books set in the Dune universe).
2. How many books do you read during a typical month?
I've slowed down considerably of late, finding myself lucky to read two or three all the way through in four weeks.
3. Where do you buy most of your books?
The local Borders Books.
4. Recommend a good book to me (and your readers).
Any of the ones mentioned in question #1. above qualifies, of course, but if you like your reading a little lighter and funnier, allow me to I suggest Audrey Niffenegger's The Time Traveler's Wife.

Leisure-time Geniuses

Courtesy of my uncle, yesterday's email brought us this bit of a cautionary tale...

AN ABSOLUTELY UNTRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT.

A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly payments of $560.00). (Hey - this has to be a U.S. story because, if Lincoln Navigators sold for this price in Canada - there would be a lot more of them around.)

He and a friend go duck hunting in mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen.
These two guys go on a lake with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.

They decide they want to make a natural looking water area for the ducks, something for the decoys to float on. Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.

So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse.

Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action: they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.

Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG???

Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained black Lab used for RETRIEVING, especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.

The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop.

The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming.

One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog!

The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a black Lab. The dog stops for seconds, slightly confused, then continues on.

Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog takes off to find cover, under the brand new Navigator.

The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

Then"""""""""KA___BOOOOOOOOOOOOM""""""""""!!!!

The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened" looks on their faces.

The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. He still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments. The dog is okay.

Two Weeks Before The Election

If you want government to intervene domestically, you're a liberal. If you want government to intervene overseas, you're a conservative. If you want government to intervene everywhere, you're a moderate. If you don't want government to intervene anywhere, you're an extremist. – Joseph Sobran (1995)

MEME: Monday Madness – Inmates Revolt!

Otto looked up from saddle-soaping her black leather bustier and remarked, “This week, 5 more questions from our fellow participants! Thank you all for playing, AND for offering suggestions. Have a fabulous week!” =)

1. From: cassie:
Dramas or comedies?
Comedies, m'dear ... they're really much finer than beer.
2. From: nutmegnine:
Your neighbor has frequent noisy parties on nights before you need to get up early. Do you confront him directly, call the police, call your landlord, join in the debauchery, or seethe quietly and do nothing?
Until 11PM, I do nothing. After 11 o'clock, I call the po-po. If the tumult continues, well, thats what they make semi-automatic shotguns for...
3. From sherle:
Are you more comfortable in big crowds or small groups?
I'm most comfortable alone, followed by small groups. I fear and loathe mob mentality.
4. From zeno:
Do you prefer Internet Explorer or Mozilla Firefox?
I've been a Mozilla user since verson 1.1 on the Sun and then the Apple Mac, followed by Netscape. I still use Netscape for business, but the rest of the time I use Firefox. I only use Micro$oft's Internet Explorer if there is no other possible choice – when updating Windoze, for instance.
5. From briar:
They say you learn something new every day. What new thing did you learn today? Hmm, the day is early – I only just got up. I'll get back to you on that, briar.

You can participate, if you are so inclined, by visiting Mistress Otto at her House of Pleasure, Pain and Grapes of Wrath to obtain your own copy of the questions (and to leave a link to your answers in the comments there).

Maine - The Way Life Should Be

"Guns, Wedding Gowns & Cold Beer" reads the sign at Hussey's General Store

via All Things Maine

MEME: Do-It-Yourself Monday Music Mambo

Rfduck, your Monday Mambo mememeister, took a moment from his busy migration to give us the following on the sweet and low: “Welcome to another Monday Music Mambo! Today is Do-It-Yourself Day.”

1. If you could play any musical instrument, which would you choose?
The piano would be my primary choice, with violin/fiddle a close second.
2. If you started your own band, what kind of music would be played? How many members would there be, and what instruments would everyone play?
Well, I suspect it'd be a hybrid barrel-house blues & bluegrass quartet. There'd be the percussionist, who is at home on just about any drum you can name or put before him, then the bassist, on both upright as well as electric bass along with occasional cello accompaniments. I, in my pipe dreams, would play mandolin, guitar, piano and fiddle, while my sideman would play banjo, rhythm guitar, ukulele, harmonica and sing, too. We'd tour 250 days of the year and have a barrel of laughs.
3. If you could manage an artist or band's career, which artist or band would you want to manage?
Just for the fun of it, I'd like to take on Nora Jones and her band. In my not so humble opinion, she's the best young vocal talent to hit the jazz/popular music scene since Maria Muldaur. Although, Queen Latifah's 2004 solo album, The Dana Owens Album, shows she can sing the balls off a brass monkey when she wants to.
4. Make up your own question here and answer it!
You know, there's a reason that rfduck asks the questions and I merely respond. Original thinking isn't my forte, particularly after the brain burn that accompanied the after-effects of my coronary bypass. So, whereas mimicry is the sincerest form of flattery, I'm going to tweak the question above. And, in keeping with Do-It-Yourself Day, I ask,

If you could make a musical instrument by hand, which instrument would you choose to make, and why?

My choice would be a guitar. More specifically, a twelve string acoustic guitar in the Martin Super Dreadnought style that was popular in the seventies. You know, like Leo_Kottke and John Fahey used to play. Mostly because I have most of the tools needed to do it and a few of the skills. Besides, I always wanted a twelve-string...

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to http://bdinsanity.blogdrive.com so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!

MEME: Sunday Seven -- Episode 60

Patrick lifted his head from a box long enough to say, “Yes, I'm still unpacking, but I've gotten much of my kitchen and pantry unpacked. And I was loading one of my cabinets, a question for this week's Sunday Seven came to me.

“But first, Carly, of "Ellipsis...Suddenly Carly" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Carly!

“On to this week's question!”

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
Name seven spices, seasonings, extracts or flavorings that you use often enough that you keep them on hand in your pantry.

1. Salt

2. Black Pepper

3. Paprika

4. Soy Sauce (Tamari & a Black Mushroom Soy)

5. Cayenne Pepper

6. Vanilla extract

7. Oregano, dried

   There's seven of the thirty or so spices, extracts, seasonings and flavorings on hand in my kitchen at any given time.

   Have a spicy week, compadres...

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings -- Week 194

15 hours, 58 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Stuff :: it

2. Block :: head

3. Ingredient :: aisle

4. Flagrant :: disregard

5. Dandruff :: shampoo

6. Betty :: Crocker

7. Tide :: detergent

8. Judges :: Bible

9. Take it easy :: Peasey

10. Chef :: Boy-ar-dee

Bet you couldn't guess I just came home from the grocery store ... sadly, the “food for lions” phreaks were out in full force.

If you want to play along, you can get a list of the words over here. And don't forget to leave a link to your efforts in the comments there. Have a good rest day.

John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #135: Songs for a Spooky Evening

Weekend Assignment: We're making a Halloween Music Mix! Suggest a song. The song can be scary, spooky or silly, but it should fit into Halloween somehow. All genres are acceptable; indeed, I'd be very interested to know of a country or samba song that would work.

Extra Credit: Are you spooked easily?

Dear John,

Almost a dirge, the Pearls Before Swine song There Was A Man has always struck me as a sad, sour song that fits well with Halloween, despite the fact that it speaks of the “suit of red” worn by the man in question. Just the sound of it raises the hairs on the back of my neck.

But the piece of music that is indelibly linked to Halloween in my mind is Modest Petrovich Mussorgsky's Night on Bald Mountain, a “tone poem” -- mostly because a music appreciation teacher took the time to introduce to me in class some fifty years ago. It's had a varied history, as the Wikipedia article points out. It actually is a tonal depiction of the celebration of the Russian witches sabbath on St. John's Night (June 23-24).

But, we can blame Uncle Walt for the mental connection – he included a version in his “Fantasia” in the 1930's and it's been stuck in the Yank's psyche ever since... and in mine since the late 1950's.

As to whether I spook easy, the answer is no. But once spooked, I take a while to come down from the adrenaline rush.

wil

"There Was A Man"
By Tom Rapp

There was a man came to our town
He wore a suit of red
He memorized with secret eyes
That he hid away in his head

He had a scar upon his head
Where there used to be a crown
But he sold his robes at the five and ten
And lived on the edge of town

That fall he showed us a magic leaf
That he could change to snow
He bought it partly with his grief
And partly with his soul

He scattered seeds in the alley way
He never seemed to rest
And when you went to ask him why
All he ever said was yes

He made a swan from waving grass
Beside a crystal shore
And a sunrise spun from broken glass
And many things wondrous more

But then his hands began to burn
When he heard the news from the war
When we cannot find each other he said
Then we can't run away any more

Next day with tears along his face
He passed us on the hill
No one thought to ask him to stay
And he knows that we never will

There was a man came to our town
He wore a suit of red
He memorized with secret eyes
That he hid away in his head.

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 132

Oh yeah...it's Saturday, isn't it? Sorry for keeping you all waiting. I had a busy day of running errands and getting out and exploring the city a bit. And as I was sitting here at the computer having a very late dinner, it occurred to me that it was time -- past time, actually -- to post the questions!

But first, Nichole of "My Two Cents" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Nicole!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. Who is the last person who you spoke to by telephone?
My wife, this evening on her dinner break. She called me...
2. Who is the last person you spoke to online?
I don't remember. I do not “IM” people often and do not use VOI at all.
3. Which of the two have you seen more in person?
Obviously, my wife.
4. Take the quiz: How is your self-esteem?

You Have Low Self Esteem 56% of the Time

While you sometimes feel good about yourself, you tend to struggle a little with self esteem issues. It's not about changing who you are, it's about accepting your faults. You just need to be less critical and demanding of yourself!

How is Your Self Esteem?

5. What is the longest period of time you have gone without internet service since you became a "regular user?"
Two weeks – the ice storm of '98
6. How much did the lack of internet availability bother you?

The deep scratches from gouging my eyes bothered me a bit...

MEME: Which Sportscar Are You?

Paul sucked me into another one...

I'm a Porsche 911!

You have a classic style, but you're up-to-date with the latest technology. You're ambitious, competitive, and you love to win. Performance, precision, and prestige - you're one of the elite,and you know it.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

This appeared in this morning's email, compliments of my uncle...

The Stranger

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors: Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey. But the stranger...he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies.

If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.

Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)

Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honor them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home... not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our longtime visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.

My Dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol. But the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing.

I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... and NEVER asked to leave.

More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures. His name?....

We just call him, "TV."

**Note: This should be required reading for every household in America!**

He has a younger sister now. We call her "Computer."

MEME: Wednesday Mind Hump -- Long Distance Day

Greetings! Ready for another mind hump? Today is Long Distance Day.

1. What's the longest distance you've ever traveled?
From Bangor, Maine via San Diego, California to Saigon, Vietnam – about 13000 miles.
2. What's the longest distance you've ever walked?
I've walked portions of the Appalachian Trail a couple of weeks at a time (about 200 miles was the most at one time).
3. How far away is the friend/relative who lives the longest distance from you?
About 1800 miles by road, just under 1600 miles straight-line distance to Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

Have a good hump day, y'all.

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've humped. Be sure your hump is linked back to http://bdinsanity.blogdrive.com so others can hump too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to hump right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Wednesday Mind Hump you can hump on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-loving mememeister wishing you a happy hump day!

Unconscious Mutterings -- Week 193

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Weeks :: months

2. Cough :: syrup

3. Jail :: time

4. Produced :: Directed

5. ? :: !

6. Stapler :: nailer

7. Next :: time

8. Perky :: tits

9. Oxygen :: tubing

10. Musical :: tent show

If you feel like playing along in your journal or blog, just visit Mistress Patricia, that full moon chica. There you can scarf up the week's words without my answers already attached. If you are bereft of webbery outlets, just leave your answers in the comments over there...

MEME: Monday Madness – Ten Things

Madam Otto took a moment from flogging her latest customer to explain, “This week's challenge comes from trista. Thank you, Trista!

Have fun with this one, and let's make it our goal to MAKE more time for ourselves to have fun! Thanks to all of you for playing!” =)

1. Name 10 things you would do if you had more time.

• Spend time with my 16 grandchildren (they all live “away”)

• Spend more time with my wife doing what SHE likes to do

• Organize my photos and slides

• Catalog my books

• Travel more – particularly overseas

• Train another Schutzhund dog

• Read more books

• Volunteer in hospital

• Learn stone masonry

• Learn blacksmithing

  What about you? Want to play along? Then visit Madam Otto's Pleasure Palace and Ye Olde Candle Shoppe to obtain the weekly questions and to leave a link to your answers. Who knows – if Otto is feeling particularly frisky, she might tickle your fancy...

MEME: Monday Music Mambo – Food for thought.

Hello! Another Monday, another Mambo. Today's theme is World Food Day.

Well, I'm behind the eight ball this week -- it's Tuesday already. But it's still the Mambo:

1. Name at least three bands/artists with food in their name.
Pearl Jam, Cream, Black-eyed Peas.
2. Tell me a song that reminds you of the following tastes (one song for each taste):

Sweet – Sweet Adeline -- Elliott Smith
Sour - Sour Girl -- Stone Temple Pilots
Salty – Salty Dog – Johnny Cash
Bitter - Through the Bitter Frost and Snow - Susan McKeown
Bland - Way too many songs are bland – I tend to forget their names right away, if ever I knew them.
Spicy - Spicy Mama – Michael Thomas

3. You're a rock star, and you can request any food item for your post-show party backstage. What yummy food awaits in your dressing room?
I'm in a lobster mood ... so let's come offstage to iced Cajun steamed rock lobster tails, lobster stew, garnished with lobster chips and fried clams, lobster & clam dip with blue-corn tortilla chips, lobster rolls, and some flaming broiled Maine lobsters with drawn butter. Yea, that'll keep us on the porcelain pot for a week or so...

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to http://bdinsanity.blogdrive.com so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 131

Here's the first Saturday Six posted from my new, mostly-still-unpacked writing office! To mark the occasion, I thought I'd do something a little different this time. This week's edition focuses on some of the Seven Deadly Sins. It's maybe a little quiz-heavy, but it should give some interesting responses.

But first, Wil of "The Daily Snooze" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Wil!

Well, thank you! I just thought I was in a queue of respondents...

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. Take the quiz: How much sloth do you have?
Your Sloth Quotient: 31%
2. Take the quiz: How much wrath do you have?
Your Wrath Quotient: 71%
3. Take the quiz: How much lust do you have?
Your Lust Quotient: 37%
4. Take the quiz: How much envy do you have?
Your Envy Quotient: 30%
5. Take the quiz: How much pride do you have?
Your Pride Quotient: 25%
6. Of these five sins, which quiz's response seemed most different from your real personality?

Number 2 – I'm pretty easy-going, except behind the wheel.