John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #54: Tell us all a single piece of wisdom you've learned from personal life experience. It can be a small thing, it can be a big thing, a simple tip or trick or the most important thing you've ever learned from life. But whatever it is, you should be able to state it in one sentence. That way people will remember it easier.
Extra Credit: Tell us: Would you have listened to your own bit of advice as a teenager? Be honest, now.
Dear John,
My father offered this up to me one day as we were standing in front of a pissoir at a state fair grounds near Lancaster, Pennsylvania.
"Never pass up a chance to take a piss;" he said, "the bladder you save, may be your own."
I didn't give it much thought at the time, but as I age and such things as "water pills" and matters of the "prostate" enter my view scape, the advice has taken on a whole new meaning. It's particularly piquant in light of my brother's battles with bladder cancer.
I became an 'instant daddy' when I married my first wife; she had two children, 5 and 7. I took that advice of my father's to heart when shepherding them back and forth from here in Maine to their father's home in Vermont. Five year olds haven't the storage capacity that 25 year olds do, even if they do drink the same sized soda at Mickey-D's. So my carefully planned rest breaks, developed from years of commuting between the two states, were next to useless in light of the plaintive wails emanating from the back seat ... "I've got to goooo. " "Me too, BAD!"
Well, traveling US Route 2 in northern Maine, New Hampshire and Vermont isn't like driving the New Jersey Turnpike. Rest stops are few and far between, particularly after dark in winter. They mostly consist of freezing cold outhouses which can only be reached after trudging knee-deep through the snow, then shoveling out the door enough with your foot to let the youngest pass with the flashlight held out in front of her like a light saber, ready to do battle with the demons of the Stygian Depths within.
Then comes the waiting. Did you know that little girls are very self-conscious when they discover that others can hear them pee into a giant holding tank? Little brothers know this from the time they are hatched! And, they let little sisters know about it in no uncertain terms from just outside, while hopping from one foot to another, threatening to enter and do unspeakable things that their mother would definitely disapprove of, except she knew better than to leave the warmth of the car in the middle of nowhere at o'dark thirty...
Now, as I travel down the ever steepening decline of life, I find myself in need of the pause that refreshes far more often than in my youth. My father's advice comes in exceedingly handy, even if I didn't understand it's true import the first time I contemplated it's meaning.
Our best to Krissy and Athena and congrats on finishing off the "Rough Guide To Science Fiction." Admittedly it isn't the end of November, but then again, we always knew THAT target date was overly optimistic.
Grins and giggles,
wil
PS Just a gentle reminder. They are chiseling open the carpal tunnel on my right wrist on Monday, the new computer is still DOA and this old one doesn't do sound bites very well -- it's going to be a few weeks before you hear from me again, I suspect. I'll post an "I'm OK" entry after the anesthesia wears off, but it'll be strictly hunt and peck with my off hand's pinkie finger. Longer entries are out of the question. Ciao!
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