Sunday, December 31, 2006

Too Funny

One of my favorite online cartoons is The Devil's Panties -- here's an example of Jen's humor -- not always safe for work, but then again, neither is The Daily Snooze, for that matter.

Unconscious Mutterings -- Week 204

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Resolution :: Dissolution

  2. Happy :: Birthday

  3. Bubbly :: personality

  4. Kiss :: “Besso mi mucho”

  5. Leather :: bodice

  6. Fancy :: pants

  7. Pages :: Congressional

  8. Stupid :: Human Tricks

  9. Apologize :: Nixon

  10. Secrets :: kept

Happy New Year, folks.

Saturday, December 30, 2006

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 142

Much of the country is under an arctic chill. So rather than go outside, why not stay indoors with some comfort food and a new list of questions!

But first, Jude of "My Way" was first to play last week. Congratulations, Jude!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. You spot a UFO, a genuine flying saucer. You decide to mention it to those close to you. Do you expect that most would believe you, or assume that you're either joking or nuts?
Most would assume that I was either joking or nuts or both – I usually fit that description...
2. If it had to be one or the other, would you prefer that your blog readers were all family and friends who knew you personally or folks who had never met you in person, and why?
Folks I'd never met – they're the target audience now, too. As to why, I have only an uncle, my mother's brother, left of relatives I am descended from or directly (first order) related to. Everyone else are either stepchildren, inlaws, outlaws and cousins several levels distant on the family tree. So I really would have a very small audience. Even smaller than what I have now – and that just wouldn't be worth the effort.
3. Are you planning to do any special posts tomorrow or Monday to look back over either your best posts or the significant events of 2006?
Nope, nothing special. My fount of wisdom runneth dry – there's only so many times you can tell folks to always take the opportunity to pee when it presents itself...
4. Take the quiz: What kind of jewel are you?
DIAMOND - the quiz was remarkably stupid, too.
5. Do you own a piece of jewelry with this particular jewel in it?

No, the only jewelry I own and wear is a plain gold wedding band. I have some silver cuff links someplace, but no genstones since my high school ring.
6. Whether you normally make them or not, suppose that you have to make one new year's resolution: what would it be? I suppose I'd resolve to get organized. Never gonna happen, but you were the one who said I HAD to make a resolution, Patrick...

If YOU want to play along, you can get your own copy of these questions without my answers by clicking on the Saturday Six banner above. Don't forget to leave a link to your answers in the comments there, so we can all see your answers. Ciao, babe!

Friday, December 29, 2006

Punny Thoughts For The New Year

Via the Cincinatti Faculty Club newsletter, the Summer 2003 Club Crier, comes these punny thoughts for the New Year:

A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired. (Well spoken.)

A will is a dead giveaway. (Well of corpse!)

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. (Don’t egg me on.)

If you don’t pay your exorcists you may get repossessed. (Not a ghost of a chance.)

With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

A lot of money is tainted. (It taint yours and it taint mine!)

Every calendar’s days are numbered.

Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat. (Can’t keep those oldies in toe?)

Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. (Sew it seams.)

Acupuncture is a jab well done. (What's the point?)

He had a photographic memory that was never developed. (But a picture of health.)

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. (I’ve heard that yolk before.)

John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #145: 2007 Resolutions

Weekend Assignment 145:
Make at least one resolution for 2007.

Extra credit: Did you keep your resolutions for 2006?

Dear John,

How fortuitous of you to ask this question, what with New Year's Eve fast approaching and all. And dude, just how synchronous can this old world be, when this “New Year's Resolution Generator” link showed up on several Live Journal blogs tonight that I regularly read?

In the year 2007 I resolve to:
Figuring out why I really need 7 e-mail addresses.

Get your resolution here.

I mean, is that wild, or what? I don't make it a habit to make New Year's Resolutions. I made none for 2006 that I can remember keeping and what appeared here reminds me that I broke with the past last year to make some, much to my sorrow. Anyway, I have managed to avoid the imposition of a resolution by your fluffy friend, as well as the 14 or so felines that share either the house or the great outdoors (PETA members, read “cellar” rather than outdoors when temps are cold enough to justify burning a stove to keep pipes from freezing – the cats come in and out at will). Although, Lexy Cat is tugging at my sleeve with a list of demands involving fresh litter every day, salmon soufflé on Saturdays and No Shots Ever! on the top of the petition on her clipboard...

So do your best with keeping your resolves and protecting the lives and interests of your loved ones. I'll be seeing you farther down the trail, Buckaroo...


Thursday, December 28, 2006

Attack Dog Disguise

To US from Australia, via the J Walk Blog comes this method of getting around local ordinances against your Doberman Pinscher (German Shepherd, Rottweiler, pit bull, etc.) -- a viable disguise:

: dressing your dog like this will increase the chance of it biting you
(If you copy the above images, please mention this.)

MEME: Wednesday Mind Hump – PostChristmas Slump

Suffering a post-Christmas Cookie sugar rush, Russ exclaims, “Hi everyone! Here's your post-holiday Mind Hump, if you desire to play after all the enjoyment.”

“All you have to do is tell us what you got for Christmas!”

“If you don't celebrate Christmas, tell us about the most memorable holiday you celebrated this past year.”

Well, here it is Thursday morning and I somehow forgot to check on the Hump! yesterday. Russ, I made out like a bandit. Sandy Paws brought me a fuzzy navy blue lap robe, a grey pinstriped wool vest, a loden colored wool shirt (both from Woolrich), a Turkey Roaster, an electric handheld mixer, a subscription to Model Railroading, A four disc DVD set of Dinosaurs! And a two-mug set with Hot Chocolate included! Yummy! Also, Bob Dylan's “Modern Times”, The Beatles “Love” album from the Cirque de Soleil and Leonard Cohen's “Dear Heather” CD's.

What more could an old phart need?

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've humped. Be sure your hump is linked back to so others can hump too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to hump right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Wednesday Mind Hump you can hump on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-loving mememeister wishing you a happy hump day!

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Three new MRSA cases at hospital

"Three more cases of a new strain of MRSA have been identified at a hospital where two people have already died from the "superbug."
That, according to the Daily Mail. The sad thing to me is that hospitals stateside appear absolutely
unconcerned by the growing incidence of MRSA here...


Travel-time contours for the Boxing Day tsunami. The source zone is roughly constrained by the tsunami arrival times at the Vishakapatnam and Cocos Islands tide gauges. (the latter is indicated by the magenta inverted triangle southwest of Indonesia). Contours are at 15-minute intervals, and alternate colour every hour. (Figure generated using software provided with the Integrated Tsunami Database for the Pacific, by Slava Gusiakov.)(Larger image [GIF 177Kb])image © copyright 2005 Government of AustraliaBoxing Day 2004 Tsunami Contours
image © copyright 2005 Government of Australia

Two years ... feels like yesterday. What horrors await the world today?

I do hope you and yours are safe and sound. Have a good one:


My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is:

Milord Earl William the
Incontrovertible of Tempting St Mary

your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

I do like the thought of Tempting St. Mary...
Via Ivy of Ivy Is Here

Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas!

This photo, via the Eros Blog, really speaks to my sense of one of my fondest memories of Christmas: Snowball Fight!

Sadly, the ground is bare here. Sadder still, my days of hanging out with nude nymphets is long gone...

I hope you all got your bells jingled until your heart's content!

Sunday, December 24, 2006

MEME: Sunday Seven - Episode 69

This past week, we lost one of the greats in the world of animated cartoons, Joseph Barbera. The list of the characters created by Barbera and his partner William Hanna is lengthy. You can see it for yourself here. That little bit of reading should prepare you for this week's question.

But first, Jude, of "My Way" was first to play last week for the second week in a row! That means that Jude has the distinction of being first to play for both the Saturday Six and Sunday Seven for two weeks in a row! Congratulations, Jude!

On to this week's question!

Name your top seven favorite Hanna-Barbera cartoons.

  1. Fred Flintstone (The Flintstones)

  2. Yogi Bear Show

  3. Tom & Jerry

  4. Huckleberry Hound Show

  5. The Jetsons

  6. Quickdraw McGraw

  7. The Ruff and Reddy Show

That was a trifle difficult – I stopped watching cartoons very early in my teens (aided by living outside of the US) and I must confess I didn't watch very much in the way of Hanna-Barbera stuff when I was younger. I preferred things like Popeye, Bugs Bunny, Mickey Mouse and the earlier cartoons to the relatively static images of those from the H-B house. Just a personal preference, I guess. Then came Rocky and Bullwinkle – paws down, the best cartoons on television, ever.

John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #144: Holiday Greetings

It's a busy time of year, so I thought I make this an easy Weekend Assignment for you:

Weekend Assignment #144: Make a holiday greeting for your friends here on AOL Journals and online. You were going to do that anyway, I bet, but now it'll fulfill your Weekend Assignment, too. See? Told you it would be easy.

Extra Credit: Uh, name your favorite of Santa's reindeer.

A Joyous Noël To All!

And thus we begin the response to this “gross”¹ entry to the Weekend Assignment. Noël, according to the entry in the Wickipedia for “The First Nowell” is traditionally associated with the Nativity, that is, the birth of Jesu Cristo. However, some entymologists believe it is an older reference from the Gaulish words "noio" or "neu" meaning "new" and "helle" meaning "light" referring to the winter solstice when sunlight begins overtaking darkness.” So, a greeting of “Have A Joyous New Light” isn't out of the question at this time of year as the light begins to return to the Northern Hemisphere, signalling a rebirth of the land, the vegetation and, dare I say it, the human spirit. For long before the psychiatric community recognized Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.), humankind has referred to “winter of our discontent,” “darkness, drab and dreary,” “the dark tea time of the soul” when discussing Autumn and the descent into Winter.

Regardless, I do wish all of you, my gentle readers (except Paul, only because he's a little violent – but I do include him in the general class of readers, heh) a Very Merry ... Christmas, Channukah, Noël, Yule, Solstice, Kwaanzah and/or Festivus (have I forgotten anyone?) and a Happy New Year.

John, I extend my warmest wishes for continued success to you in 2007. Do take care of Krissy and Athena, they truly are your “reason for the season.”


P.S. My favorite reindeer is that johnny-come-lately entry in the Reindeer Pantheon -- “Rudy Randawl”! He's the kind of reindeer your mother warned you about. A blues musician by trade, Rudy's a hard-drinking, four-hooved dirty fighter, a doe-chaser and (whispering) it's rumored he's into fawns!

You can learn all about Rudy right here at the Looney Bin, watching their animated production of “Take My Antlers, Please!” and then the end of the story, "Rebel Without A Claus" You'll need to have Shockwave! installed and a good, fast connection (or a sleighload of patience). In case you didn't figure it out, this is for the amusement of folks who aren't dripping wet behind the ears. Sex, drugs and the Does don't wear bells around their necks, if'n you get my drift...

¹ In this case, "gross" in a numerical sense, ie. a dozen dozen, or 144. Get it?

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings -- Week 203

That cracy chica, La Luna Nińa, said the following:

“Thanks for playing! I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday in the company of good friends and loved ones!”

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Terrify :: Frighten

  2. Month :: Day

  3. Throat :: sore

  4. Invasion :: force

  5. Nail :: head

  6. 12 :: 20

  7. Bicker :: women

  8. Thomas :: Doubting

  9. Sibling :: love

  10. Delude :: America

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Wishing & Hoping...

A Cure for Diabetes?

Saturday Six - Episode 141

Patrick looks up from his flagon of eggnog and explains, I wish you all the merriest of Christmases and the happiest of New Years! Here's a holiday-themed edition of the Saturday Six.”

“But first, Nichole of "My Two Cents" was first to play last week for the second week in a row! Congratulations again , Nichole!”

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!”

1. How many Christmas Cards did you receive from people you hadn't sent cards to, after the "mailing deadline?" Did you send a card anyway?
None that I can think of. I/we don't send cards, so it really is a non-issue for me/us.
2. At this point, do you weigh more or less than you did on January 1, 2006? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
About the same. I fluctuate in weight about eight pounds at any given time. Losing weight with diabetes is such a task...
3. When the clock strikes Midnight on New Year's, will you be at home, at a party, or somewhere else?
Unless I am sitting in the car in the parking lot of the nursing home where my wife works, waiting for her to come out so we can go home, I expect I will be at home, on the computer, waiting for my wife to return. It's dependant on weather and how my wife was feeling that day when she got ready for work.
4. Take the quiz: What's your holiday stress level?

Silly quiz alert -- the choices bear little resemblance to reality.

Your Holiday Stress Level is Moderate

The holidays sometimes stress you out, but mostly because they wear you down.
Take it easy! You can have a fun holiday without running yourself ragged.

What's Your Holiday Stress Level?

5. Have you ever been the designated driver at a party or outing with your friends?
Sure. Even when I was an active drinker, I was often the designated driver. It's one of those things I can/could do – supress the desire for pleasure to the greater good.
6. Have you ever taken the keys and driven home a friend that you felt was too drunk to drive? If not, do you think you would attempt to if that situation ever arose?

I've done that many times in the past. I've also stolen keys out of coats and purses so the drunks have no choice but to stay until sober after sleeping it off. I've also called the police and advised them of inebriated operators on the road. I may be a drunk ... but I'm a responsible drunk.

Happy Festivus!

Festivus, as Frank explained it, is a celebration like no other, composed of do-it-yourself ceremonies based on the principle that "father knows best".

Frank Costanza:
Inventor of Festivus
© copyright Sony Pictures Entertainment

A Brief History of Festivus: A Holiday for the Rest of Us.

"The story of that first Festivus is a simple one. Many December 23rd's ago, a great man named Frank Costanza went to buy a doll for his son. He reached for the last one, but so did another man. As Frank rained blows upon him, he thought there had to be another way. The doll was destroyed, but out of that, a new holiday was born. It was called Festivus. No, not feminist, Festivus. A Festivus for the rest of us."

Friday, December 22, 2006

YULE! (circa December 21)
(Winter Solstice, December 20-23 (varies according to the particular date on the standard calendar according to when the Solstice will occur astronomically)). Longest night of the year, the turning point when the days shall afterwards grow longer as winter begins its passage into the coming spring. It is, in the Goddess worship, the time when she gives forth again to the birth of the Divine Sun child who shall be both child and eventually lover and father of the next child in the cycle. Winter Solstice for pagans is a time of feasting and the exchanging of gifts and is the original Holiday that the Christian religions modified into their own Christmas, even up to the birth of the child (Most theologians who have spent time studying the birth of Jesus admit he was born in either March or April, not the celebrated Christmas date we all know from the standard calendar - it was moved to this date in the 4th century A.D. by the Roman Catholic Pope to help induce Pagans to give up their old ways yet allow them their holidays during the spread of Christianity through Europe and the British Isles). Traditional adornments are a Yule Log, usually of oak, and a combination of mistletoe and holly (also all later plagiarized into Christian ways).

Thursday, December 21, 2006

It's Coming

And I don't mean the Second Coming of Jesu Cristo, either. No, I'm referring to the seventh and final book in the Harry Potter series. B. Dalton's and Waldenbooks have flooded my email box with announcements of the Immanence. I have given the Internet imps my email address, so I will be found on that final day -- the day one can order the tome, online, of course...

Happy Winter Solstice

At 7:22 PM, local time, Winter began. As you rush madly to your next Christmas or Hannukah party, as you shop in a tither for last minute gifts, as you make your way to your local storefront church to join others in a celebration of Kwanza, I ask you all to take a moment and remember this:

Man 'hibernated' for 24 days after fall

A man who slipped down a Japanese mountain survived unconscious in cold weather without food and water for more than three weeks by lapsing into a state of "hibernation", doctors said.

Mitsutaka Uchikoshi had almost no pulse, his organs had all but shut down and his body temperature had dipped by a third when he was discovered by a climber on Rokko mountain near Kobe, 24 days after he disappeared.

A Public Service Safety Message For Christmas

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Wednesday Mind Hump – Smile, You're On ...

Hi everyone! I hope the holiday season is treating you all well. Here's this week's Mind Hump, with the theme "Dot Your I's With Smileys Day." There won't be a mambo on Monday, because Monday is Christmas and your mememeister will have no time to get on the computer. You probably won't either, so there's no point in posting on that day.

1. Name a song that makes you smile.
The Grateful Dead's rendition of Morning Dew.
2. Name a food that makes you smile.
3. Name a person that makes you smile.
My wife, SWMBO. (She Who Must Be Obeyed!)
4. Name a movie that makes you smile.
Harvey. What isn't there to smile about a 9 foot tall Puka?
5. Name a website that makes you smile.
A new find (today!) via Dorn: Meez: MeezMaker
The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've humped. Be sure your hump is linked back to so others can hump too.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

REPORT: The United States of America is Insolvent

The U.S. Treasury Department PR machine tried to slip this one past us all, unnoticed. We are broke. Busted. Unable to meet or discharge financial obligations. Bankrupt. Insolvent. Dr. Chris Martenson, author of The End of Money, says the Treasury, according to this report cum editorial at Financial Sense University, a website devoted to returning to a rational economic policy in this country.
Given how studiously our nation is avoiding this topic both in the major media outlets and during our last election cycle, I sometimes feel as if I live in a small mountain town that has decided to ignore an avalanche that has already let loose above in favor of holding the annual kindergarten ski sale.
Read it. Take it to heart. Then forward it, by both email and snailmail/hardcopy to your Congress critters. Make a copy and keep it with you to share with others. Digest it slowly over time. But take it to heart -- we HAVE gone to hell in a handbasket and we are ALL TO BLAME.

Happy Holidays.

Via J-Walk Blog.

Sad News: J. B. Hunt Dies at 79

If you've spent any time on the Interstate highway system in the United States, you are familiar with the yellow and black logo of the J.B. Hunt Transportation company. Founder and namesake J.B. Hunt passed away a little over ten days ago; I only heard about it this morning. Here's a link at CNN/Money Online that announces his death. He was a giant in the trucking industry...

Monday, December 18, 2006

MEME: Monday Madness - Blogger Phone Home

Otto is having a miserable time with her computers. Witness:

I was going to use questions from one of our participants, but I cannot get into my email to get the questions! SO, Kia and Zeno, and Tricia, please forgive me. I will use your ideas next time. =) Here goes!”

1. I get about __two__ telemarketer phone calls on a daily basis.
2. I never call anyone after _midnight_ at night.
3. I never call anyone before _nine_ in the morning.
4. I
DON'T screen my phone calls via caller ID (I use an answering machine, instead).
5. I really should call _______ more often. Hmm, no one comes to mind.

I hope you all have a wonderful week and I'll (Otto, that is - I'm still here) be back the 1st of January!!! Thanks to all of you for playing!

MEME: Monday Music Mambo – Week Umpty-ump minus one

Rfduck sent this dispatch from Mamboville (turn left at the sign for the North Pole and then on until midnight) "Christmas will be here in one week! This week's mambo will be about Christmas music. I'll put up an additional question for those who don't celebrate Christmas."

1. What are your favorite Christmas songs?
Good King Wenceslas (Duke of Bohemia who encouraged Christianization and was martyred by his brother Boleslav. He is popularly associated with Christmastide charity and is the patron saint of Bohemia), Deck The Halls, Jingle Bells, Silent Night -- your basic “classics”.
2. What Christmas song do you dislike?
I recently discussed that here.
3. Do you prefer Christmas carols, classics or new interpretations?
None of the above. Not being a Christian, my general response is “Eh!?!” to the whole issue of Christmas music. These days, I can stay in my own little musical cocoon by sticking with routine, listening to local public radio offerings in the car and Radio Paradise when working at the desktop.

And a question for everyone:

4. Was this a good musical year for you? What were your favorite purchases/downloads/new discoveries? Not a bad year from my POV, musically. There were several “finds” for me this year. Biggest Earworm Award goes to Gnarls Barkley's breakout, cross-platform, cross-generational hit Crazy from the St. Elsewhere album. The reproduction of a number of Beatles tunes for the Cirque d' Soleil, currently in performance, is the kick ass album Love. I also fell in love with Bob Dylan's Modern Times album, and I am absolutely smitten with Leonard Cohen's Dear Heather album, just to name a few...

Sunday, December 17, 2006

John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #143: What You'd Want, If You Were a Kid

For this week's Weekend Assignment, I want you get in touch with your inner child -- and give it a gift list:

Weekend Assignment #143: Imagine you are a kid today, age 10 or under. What would you want for Christmas/Hanukkah/Seasonal Holiday of Your Preference? Don't look back on the toys of your youth, now -- think about what kids have now that you would want if you were their age. Also if you're a parent, don't ask your kids what they want -- this is supposed to be about what you would want, if you were their age. I love my daughter, but I guarantee you, there are things she wants that if I were a kid her age I wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole.

Extra Credit: Do you kinda want the same toy now that you're an adult? Come on, you can admit it if you do.

Dear Uncle John,

Momma says you called to say Hi! and wanted to know what I want for xmas? That you and Aunt Krissy wanted to get me something really special? Wow! I asked Santa for a new bicycle and I asked Grammy from a new sweater (because that is what she gets me every xmas, so why rock the boat?). I asked Momma and Dad for a new Lionel train set with real smoke and a whistle that blows and a log loader and an electro-magnet like they have at Electric Boat in New Haven. You know, like you can see from the turnpike?

I didn't tell anyone about the secret thing I want. It's a genuine MS Composite Stinger 6 PRO Almost Ready-To-Fly Fully Tuned Helicopter! You got to see it. It's so kewl! It flies on gas and has a real gas motor and can go really high and do stuff, like spray crops (I think). It uses an R/C control system and it costs a lot of money. I left the catalog in the bathroom where Dad could see it. It was open to the page with the helicopter on it. He came out sputtering about how much it costs to Mom, so I know it's really expensive.

Tell Cousin Athena she can play with my toys when you guys come for the big party next week.

Your favorite nephew,


P.S. My grumpy old curmudgeon self in the future says “H-e-double golf clubs, yes!” when he contemplated the extra credit question.

MEME: Unconscious Mutterings – Week 202

Free association is described as a "psychoanalytic procedure in which a person is encouraged to give free rein to his or her thoughts and feelings, verbalizing whatever comes into the mind without monitoring its content." Over time, this technique is supposed to help bring forth repressed thoughts and feelings that the person can then work through to gain a better sense of self.

That's an admirable goal, but for the purposes of this exercise, we're just hoping to have a little fun with the technique. Each week I'll post ten words to which you can respond to with the first thing that comes to mind.

"Rules are, there are no rules." There are no right or wrong answers. Don't limit yourself to one word responses; just say everything that pops into your head. AND you don't have to have your words up on Sunday. Take all week if you want! Read the FAQ for more information.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Week 202

Words posted 4 hours, 25 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Hardball :: politics

  2. Sleepless :: nights

  3. Graduation :: ceremony

  4. Presents :: gifts

  5. Toe :: fungus

  6. Lotion :: motion

  7. Snicker :: giggle

  8. Eve :: morn

  9. Investment :: plan

  10. Pain :: Vicodin

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 140

I hope you're all having a nice, restful weekend. I slept late, then took a nap already today! I might actually get some Christmas shopping done later today.

But first, Nichole of "My Two Cents" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Nichole!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!

1. Christmas cards must be mailed by Monday to arrive on time. Do you think you'll make the deadline?
Nope. I don't send cards.
2. If you had to restrict all of your Christmas shopping to one single store, which one would you choose?
L.L. Bean
3. If you had to restrict all of the shopping others did for your Christmas gifts to one store, which would you choose?
The same: L.L. Bean
4. Take the quiz: Which Jones Holiday Soda are you?

You Are Smoked Salmon Pate Soda

Tasting like fish ain't so bad!

What Jones Holiday Soda Are You?

5. You're invited to a Christmas party and are required to bring a dessert. What would you create for the occasion?
Maybe an old favorite: Bulghur and Raisins with Maple Syrup flavored Whipped Cream
6. How many Christmas parties have you been invited to this season? How many have you attended so far? None. And I won't be going to any, either.

You, too, can make an ass of yourself by playing along in your blog. Just click on the banner that says The Saturday Six At Patrick's Weekender up there and copy the questions for pasting into your own word processor for composition of your answers.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Insidious Eyeworm Video

Via Corn Child @ Blog Happens comes this insidious eyeworm video: Ding Fries Are Done!

Monday, December 11, 2006

A Modest Proposal

This struck a cord when I first read it this weekend, as I have been a pall bearer in the past and have come away annoyed at the sad picture presented by men with two left feet stumbling along, unable to decide which hand to hold the casket with, always out of step with the others on their side. Then there's sometimes me -- the Mutt in the Mutt and Jeff routine as I am all of 5'8" on good days and have in-laws and stepsons who range from about 6'-0" to scraping the ceiling with their mohawks!

I remember how impressive a military honor guard was when they buried friends from the Vietnam War and how startled I was by the precision of a firefighters' parade unit performing this honor at a funeral for a man lost his life to our common enemy of the day, fire.

Now that it has bounced around my head a day, I see even more merit in this modest proposal by the oh-so-intelligent Og of Neanderthal (the blog) fame. And, it's a sad state of affairs that I am past the age where my help is even asked for when the subject comes up...

Neanderpundit » It’s settled, then.

MEME: Monday Madness – Gabrielle Queries The Host

Otto is suffering mightily from CRS¹, so she's enlisted the help of regular abusers of her hospitality to come up with some goldarned questions. Here, Gabrielle slipped and ran forward when we all ran backwards when Otto announced she needed volunteers ... “This week's questions come from our good friend, and faithful participant, gabrielle. Thanks so much for your questions, Gabrielle!! And everyone, thank you for playing and have a wonderful week! (I may be taking Christmas Day off, which is in 2 weeks, so if you don't see questions posted that day, don't panic. I will certainly be back the following week.)” =)

1. What song gives you the most holiday cheer? Jethro Tull's The Christmas Song does the trick for me:

Once in royal David's city, stood a lonely cattle shed,
Where a mother held her baby.
You'd do well to remember the things he later said.
When you're stuffing yourselves at the Christmas parties,
You'll just laugh when I tell you to take a running jump.
You're missing the point I'm sure does not need making
That Christmas Spirit is not what you drink.

So how can you laugh when your own mother's hungry?
And how can you smile, when the reasons for smiling are wrong?
And, if I just messed up your thoughtless pleasures,
Remember, if you wish, this is just a Christmas song.

(Hey! Santa! Pass us that bottle, will you? )

2. Who is the hardest person to shop for on your holiday list? My wife. I join the legions of Lost Men wandering the department stores at the local mall, listlessly fingering merchandise, totally unable to arrive at a buying decision when confronted with the need to by her a Christmas gift. Everyone else I'm a “Captain of Industry”, forthright, decisive, impatient; able to formulate a buying strategy and execute same with a minimum of time wasted, with no fuss nor bother. Tell me to get a gift for my wife and I'm a first grader, sucking my thumb, utterly hopeless. It's infuriating!
3. When do you start your holiday shopping? Christmas Eve at noon. Any sooner results in SWMBO either discovering the gift, me blurting out the information and having to make a new purchase or “buyer's remorse” resulting in a return and “wash, rinse, repeat” of the process.
4. What food or drink do you love when it's cold out? (Recipes and recommendations, please!) Hot Chocolate (SwissMiss Milk Chocolate with marshmallows), a “Hot Toddy” of Coffee and Bourbon or Irish Whiskey, French Onion Soup made from an Ox-Tail broth and lots of sweet Vadahlia onions. Roast Beef with Yorkshire Pudding.
5. What do you do to get rid of a cold or flu?
I send the little rugrats home to their parents...

You, too, can join in the Monday Madness! Just visit Mistress Otto's Monday Madness Boutique of Horror and Pain and snag some questions for yourself.

MEME: Monday Music Mambo - Radio Day Blues

Monday Music Mambo

Russ took a moment from his busy schedule to say, “Hello again! It's time for another Monday Music Mambo. Today is a special day for us - it's Radio Day!”

1. What is your favorite radio station?
It's a toss-up these days between WERU-FM, a community-based radio station loosely associated with Noel Paul Stookey (of Peter, Paul and Mary fame) as it started out in a corner of a chicken house on his property, and Maine Public Radio station WMEH-FM, a listener-funded radio service that specializes in classical, jazz, Celtic and world music and world-class news service. WERU-FM is folksy, fun and funky in the music played and runs the gamut of the far-left wing political spectrum in it's “news” coverage (that's OK – there's always WVOM-FM, The “Voice of Maine”, if you need an extreme right-wing POV fix).

2. What kind of radio stations did you listen to while growing up?
As a young kid, my first awareness of radio station(s) were the Philadelphia clear channel, Top 10 (this was back when dinosaurs roamed and there weren't but one or two new releases per week) AM stations my mother listened to and the local AM outlet that played country music, polkas and announced school closings. Despite my mother's preference for current crooners, my father was addicted to Big Band and Swing-era music, so that was what we heard in the evening and weekends when he was around. Babysitters opened my eyes to “Rock and Roll” at a relatively early stage in my oh-so-warped development. Of course, there was Dick Clark's “American Bandstand” on the local TV station after school that we had to watch with the babysitter(s) if we were inside because of bad weather. Later, it was WABC in New York that captured my imagination at night. Then a move to Maine reintroduced the concept of local programming with WGUY and WABI-AM being the two that stand out in my memory now, in addition to such clear channel favorites late at night like WBZ in Boston and WWV in Wheeling, West Virginia. In college, when not listening to the station(s) I managed or worked for, I listened to “progressive” rock stations in Montreal. In addition, all through the sixties I listened to shortwave radio while I was out of the country.

3. If you had control of a radio station right now, what five songs would you play? You can pick anything you want, you're in control!
The five enamourata I'd choose right now have all been mentioned in previous Monday Mambo's here, I think. Let's start the set off with Dire Strait's evocative Down to the Waterline. Bringing the mood back up a wee bit would be the Rolling Stones' Sympathy for the Devil. Smooth it out with Bob Dylan's Modern Times breakout hit, Someday Baby. Slow it back down and somber with Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt. Bring it on home with Leonard Cohen's irreverent Closing Time. There you have it – The All Male Review of the Sixties Dead (or soon to be dead) movers and shakers of the past millennium...

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!

Posted at 12:34 am by rfduck the music-loving mememeister

Sunday, December 10, 2006

MEME: Sunday Seven - Episode 67

Sorry for the delay in posting today's questions. My parents came by for a visit today, and I took them to dinner at a local popular seafood restaurant. My dad says his doctor wants him to lose 40 pounds, but he seems to be on his typical "see-food" diet. In any case, tonight's dinner was not only tasty, but it provided the inspiration for a new question.

But first, Weirdgrrl, of "Limes With Orange" was first to play last week! And since the topic of last week's question concerned soft drinks, she titled her post "7-Up!" I can't resist a clever pun, so I pass along a double congratulations to Weirdgrrl!

On to this week's question!

Name up to seven of your favorite items to eat in a seafood restaurant.

  • Lobster (Boiled or steamed)

  • Lobster Stew

  • Broiled Scallops

  • Broiled Swordfish

  • Bouillabaisse

  • Shore Dinner (Steamed Clams, Steamed Lobster, steamed Irish Moss, Corn-on-the-cob, drawn sweet butter, Caesar Salad, Champagne – or Seagram's Dry Ginger Ale for the kiddies)

  • Captain's Platter – Fired Haddock, Fried Whole Clams, Fried Shrimp, French Fried Potatoes, Coleslaw – really should be called the Cardiologist's Delight...

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings - Week 201

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Research :: Grant
  2. Chuck :: Wagon
  3. Insert :: Blow In
  4. Bang :: boink
  5. Lousy :: icky
  6. Rehearsal :: For Retirement
  7. Critics :: Siskel & Ebert
  8. Memory :: Faulty
  9. Squid :: Calamari
  10. Remove :: Do Not
Wanna play along? Hie thee off to Mistress Patricia, she of La LunaNiña fame, and get thee your own words!

Putting The "STI" Back In Christmas

Via Gruntdoc, a seasonal favorite that we all should pay heed to while making Merry (or Mary, for that matter):

The Twelve STI's of Christmas

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 139

Patrick stops a moment from writing his novel to observe, Much of the country is under an arctic chill. So rather than go outside, why not stay indoors with some comfort food and a new list of questions!

But first, Gabrielle of "A Metamorphoself of Gabrielle" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Gabrielle!

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!”

1. Do you send Christmas cards? If so, do you write any notes inside the Christmas card or include a "newsletter" about your family, or do you basically just sign your name?
No, I don't send cards. I make a couple of calls to very old friends and close family and that's it for me. My wife has more people looking to her for greetings, but in general, it's not our time of year. The newsletter thing has always been problematic to me. Too often, it is merely a puff piece extolling the largely imaginary virtues of the talentless amongst us. Better a phone conversation to catch up, without the bullshit.
2. Are you more likely to shop in a store that has returned the phrase, "Merry Christmas" to its holiday signage?
No. With the resurgence lately of the “Christian Imperative” attempting (once again) to hijack the season as an exclusive holiday for Christians, it has become increasingly difficult for those who practice religions that are thousands of years older, let alone those who celebrate “Peace on Earth, good will towards men” (mankind, actually – they got that wrong in the King James' translation). Why should seasonal decorations, be they nativity scenes, depictions of Sanit Niccolas, or more modern icons, such as Rudolph, Frosty, be a determining factor as to ones buying habits?
3. Do you buy your pets Christmas presents?
No. I used to, but then “Sandy Paws” took over and she made it abundantly clear that she could do a much better job.
4. Take the quiz: Are you more cat or dog?

You Are: 80% Dog, 20% Cat

You and dogs definitely have a lot in common.
You're both goofy, happy, and content with the small things in life.
However, you're definitely not as needy as the average dog. You need your down time occasionally.

Are You More Cat or Dog?

5. Which have you owned more of during your life, cats or dogs?
Neither. However, I have been owned by many more dogs than I have tended cats.
6. If you had to come back as one or the other, and assuming you'd belong to an owner who would treat you well, would you rather be a cat or a dog?

I'd much prefer to be a dog. An old dog. Or was that an olddog?

If you want to play along, stop by Patrick's Weekender and grab the questions for yourself (you can click on the banner above to go direct to his blog),

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Elf Yourself: A Gift From OfficeMax

I don't usually pimp big box commercial sites, but here's one I've had fun with, courtesy of OfficeMax!

Friday, December 08, 2006

A Truly Inspired Rant

What I "like" the "best" about the "holidays".

By Jay of Kill The Goat fame

"By which I mean: "hate", "worst", "stupid holidays""...

Thursday, December 07, 2006


USS Arizona Memorial

Solar Storm and an M-Class Flare - Kewl!

MEME: Weekend Assignment #142

John M. Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #142: Kill These Christmas Songs

The Aol Blogmeister opines, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, and it's beginning to sound like Christmas too. Which makes this Weekend Assignment particularly trenchant. This is something I did elsewhere a couple years ago, and the response was good enough that I think is worth asking here:

Weekend Assignment #142: Your Christmas/Holiday gift is the ability to expunge one highly annoying yet popular Christmas/Holiday song from the history of the world. Which one is it?

Extra Credit: Fruitcake: Ever actually eat any?"

Dear John,

My choice for elimination from the holiday song hit parade has got to be Dr. Elmo's (formerly Elmo & Patsy) Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer.” It sets my teeth on edge just to think about it! Indeed, probably 90% of the music associated with this season sets me off, running for the woods, swinging my chainsaw at the oh-so-casual trespassers on my farm looking to score a free xmas tree. I loves me that -- just to see the spurt of bright red on the snow makes me ...

Er, I'll stop now...


PS. Yeppers, fruit cake – got's to have me some – the only legitimate reason for an old alky to suck on a piece of bourbon-soaked raisin bread, topped with hot hard sauce. Oh my, the memories! Yummy!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Great Video!

Via Boing! Boing! comes this truly hilarious video of a college couple negotiating through their lawyers over a pending sexual encounter ... | Sexual Consent

Chase Bank is Too Cheap To Fly a New Flag

Chase Bank is Too Cheap To Fly a New Flag

Wednesday Mind Hump

Rfduck takes a moment from his research on “Leftover Avoidance” to say the following:

“Hello! It's time for another Mind Hump. Today is Microwave Oven Day!”

1. How old is your microwave oven?
Not positive (it was a second-hand gift) but one is at least eight years old, the other at least ten. The one we use most often is a small combination microwave – toaster – convection oven and broiler.
2. How many times in a day do you use your microwave oven, and what do you usually use it for?
It gets used once or twice a day for thawing frozen foods, heating left overs and popping corn.
3. What's your favorite microwavable treat?
Popcorn, no question.
4. Ever had a microwave disaster? Tell us about it!

Well, there was the great turkey disaster of '97 – someone gave me a turkey and the only thing I had to cook it in was a microwave. Damn thing was a Butterball™ and the volume of fluids that came off that infernal bird was truly copious .. to the point of creating a small flood in the kitchen as it poured out of the microwave, through the door, across the counter and down onto the floor, where, due to the general lean of the kitchen away from the prevailing wind, it then attempted to exit the building via the mop rail. It was a gusher, for sure!

Have a good Hump Day, one and all!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


My friend Sharon, proprietess of So This Is A Treadmill, brought it to my attention that Feedblitz was reporting that my feed had Atom or RSS difficulties. Well, I researched the problem and discovered that they had attempted to use a defunct feed from 2003! Seems all the server problems that Blogger has had recently resulted in the publication of an ancient list of feeds, which Feedblitz then subscribed to, thinking it was the current feed. Voila -- dead feed for the Snooze.

So I've inputted the new feed manually and added a Feedblitz subscription device to the sidebar over on the right (just below the link to my Amazon wish list, in case you were thinking of sending me substantial season's greetings). That resulted in the need to republish the Daily Snooze. So, those of you who use aggregators as newsreaders, such as Bloglines, might be startled to see me with feeds from all the way back in 2003! Sorry for the inconvenience -- it was all in the name of progress.


Monday, December 04, 2006

MEME: Monday Music Mambo

Rfduck must be preening his tail feathers again – this week's topic is high faluting, for sure! See for yourself:

“Hi gang! Ready for another Mambo? I am. Today is Day Of The Artisans. In honor of that, we'll talk about arty and progressive rock. What do I mean by that? The Velvet Underground. The Smashing Pumpkins. Pink Floyd. Talking Heads. Stuff like that! However, I'll leave it completely up to your interpretation. One person's art rock is another person's garbage.”

1. What is your favorite art or progressive rock band?
By your definition, it's a coin toss between Pink Floyd and The Moody Blues, off the top of my head.
2. Name one of your favorite songs by the above-mentioned band, and another song by a different art/progressive artist.
My favorite Pink Floyd album is “The Wall” and the favorite song from that album is the three-part “Another Brick In The Wall” whereas, “Nights In White Satin” is probably my favorite Moody Blues tune. Then again, the whole musical score from "Hair!" and Andrew Lloyd Webber's "Phantom of the Opera" could be considered "progressive rock"...

3. How much art do you like in your music?
Musically, I'm a moderate. I don't mind experimentation, I enjoy new experiences if they're melodic or have other redeeming features that appeal personally. I'm not impressed with 'art for art's sake' or the fucked up attitudes it breeds. Going off the deep end without knowing how to swim (most young musicians and garage bands make this mistake), breaking the rules of music without knowing what they are or why the rules exist in the first place is often the first sign of a lazy mind, musically. That often translates into crap “music,” if one dares to even call it that.

Have a super week, fellow Mamboers, and keep your powder dry – the assault on your sanity and sensibility by those who demand “Christmas Carols” 24/7 at this time of year has begun in earnest. I actually witnessed my wife waking from a nap humming “Deck the Halls” the other day. They're not invidious, I'll give them that – they'll fry the brain cells of anyone in hearing range, be s/he Atheist, Christian, Jew, Muslim, Buddhist or Hindu. We're all grist in their mill...

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

If you don't have a blog or you're an exhibitionist *woo hoo* feel free to Mambo right here in our comments section. There's absolutely no pressure ... although it's called the Monday Music Mambo you can Mambo on any day.

Until next time, this is your music-lovin' Mememeister saying have a good Monday and a good Mambo!
Posted at 10:58 pm Sunday by rfduck the music-loving mememeister

MEME: Monday Madness -- A Plea For Help

Otto is getting frustrated as proprietor of a weekly meme. Folks, hear her out and if you have any suggestions, email Otto and help her.

I'm running out of ideas for MM challenges, folks! If you have any suggestions for me, please feel free to email me. Thank you, and thank you for your loyal and friendly participation in my meme!” =)

1. I wish people would just _ listen without comment ____.
2. My biggest pet peeve where other drivers are concerned, is _ inattention – cell phones, conversations with passengers, twiddling radio knobs, etc. _.
3. I will probably spend about _ $300 _ on holidays this season.
4. I really hope to _ (nothing comes to mind) _ by the end of this calendar year.
5. I make about _ 0 _ resolutions each year, and keep _ 100% _ of them.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Patrick's Sunday Seven - Episode 66

Patrick's Sunday Seven - Episode 66

Each year, the Jones Soda Company comes out with bizarre soda with holiday food flavors. This year, for example, you can drink Turkey and Gravy soda, Sweet Potato Soda, Dinner Roll Soda, or Pea Soda. For you dessert fans, there's Cherry Pie, Banana Cream Pie, Key Lime Pie, Apple Pie, and Blueberry Pie. If all of that weren't enough, this year, there's Antacid Flavored Soda! This oddball collection of flavors is the subject of this week's question.

But first, Melyssa, of "WifeyMom" was first to play last week! Congratulations, Melyssa!

On to this week's question!

Come up with your own list of strange flavors that you think are worthy of Jones Soda's concoctions. (They don't have to necessarily be "holiday" foods, or even flavors you'd want to drink.)

My Answers:

  1. Maryland Crabcakes Delight

  2. Gulfport Oyster Liquor

  3. Mainland Mussels Dew

  4. Laughing Loon and Lobster Bisque Stew

  5. Quahogs & Quails Quencher

  6. Sea Cucumbers & Sea Urchin Surprise (it has inside-out spines!)

  7. Giant Baja Squid Ink Soda

Bon appetit!