Old postcard of the Valcour before she was re-powered in 1990 – note the cooling water discharge (the modern engines use closed coolant systems).
Weekend Assignment: Present three "facts" about yourself: Two of the facts true, and one of the facts false. Let people guess which "fact" is the fake one. Reveal the fake fact on Monday. You don't want to give away the fake fact too early, so be sure to make it sound plausible, next to the other two real facts.
Extra Credit: Can you lie with a straight face? Really?
Dear John,
So I have to lie for you, do I? Well, I wish I could say it is difficult, but truth of the matter, I have had to lie about one thing or another most of my professional life, so why should this be any different? Then again, given the number of fictional works you've had published, it doesn't surprise me that you do such a fine job of mangling the truth, neither. Here's my three for you and the world to see.
Once upon a time, I was a Boy Scout. I was so into scouting that I made a special effort to return after living in Mexico to spend a week with my former troop members of Troop 64 – Carversville, Pennsylvania at Camp Ockanickon that I'd left behind when I moved to Guadalajara. During that week, I swam a mile, I hiked ten miles and finished up enough merit badges to become a Star Scout. I never had anything to do with the Boy Scouts ever again after that.
I used to work as an oiler on an LCT ferry that plied the waters of Lake Champlain between Burlington, Vermont and Port Kent, New York (or, as I used to think of it, “a hundred miles a day going nowhere”). One day, I was polishing brass in the forward engine room of the MV Valcour while the Chief Engineer was in the stern. The Master became distracted by the ministrations of a cute, female deck hand and ran the vessel aground in the middle of the Lake, opening up a tear in the forward hull which spanned the bulkhead between the steering gear room and the engine room. The water filled the engine room so fast I had to swim to safety. I left the ferry boat business shortly thereafter.
My wife found me in an AOL chat room for adults and chatted me up because she was fascinated with something I'd mentioned in my AOL profile. Under 'favorite activities' I used to list “frog poaching,” among others. That got her attention!
There you go, John. Three facts about me, two too true, one false. Answer as to which is the falsehood will be forthcoming on Monday. In the meantime, give your fine ladies a hug and spend some time on the lawn this weekend. Enough gallivanting about the countryside like a monarch butterfly migrating to Ontario, you've got work to do and a family to provide for.
Best Always,
wil
PS Like you, I can lie to just about anyone, except my wife. I get the galdarndest look on my face when I even try...
Want to play along? Follow the link at the top and get your own copy of the weekly question. Leave a link in the comments on John's AOL Journal, By The Way, pointing to where you have answered this week's question. Above, have fun.
UPDATE: The Truth Has Been Revealed
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