Weekend Assignment #74: Avarice

Weekend Assignment #74: Got the Wants

There are things in this world that people need to have. This week's Weekend Assignment is not about those. Weekend Assignment #74: Forget about the things you need -- Tell us about something you want. Preferably something useless and/or expensive. In other words: Toys! Something fun and/or sparkly and/or indulgent that you don't already have but wouldn't mind getting, if someone were offering. Extra Credit: Do you really think getting that toy would make you happier?

The only difference twixt men and boys
is the length of their beards
and the price of their toys.
~~ Olde English folk rhyme ~~

Dear John,

How appropriate, this topic of people's toys. I have a birthday coming up in a little bit and have been asked what I want for the celebration of said natal day. That got me to thinking about my “wants” versus my “needs” -- a scary topic in this period of three dollar gas and projections of early autumn $2.799 per gallon heating oil prices. It is hard to think about wants when it is very likely that the needs will be out of reach. But, you know me. Throw caution to the winds... Cry havoc, let loose the dogs of war!

Now, I know there isn't a snowball's chance in hell of ever getting one of these for real (Please, someone... on the back of the neck, under the pony tail? Hit the green button marked “Cliche”).

What I really want is an extremely expensive, all wheel drive vehicle manufactured by Mercedes called the UniMog (Unimog.avi 6mb). It's more of a truck than an SUV, so it makes sense that here in the US they aren't sold at the corner Chrysler/Daimler or Mercedes dealers. Noooo, not the Unimog. If you want one, swing by the closest Freightliner dealer. Right. REAL trucks... This is an expensive piece of kit, no doubt about it. But, in keeping with earlier entries I discussed last week and the week before, THIS is the platform to mount that 55mm automatic machine gun and cannon I was talking about. First off, it's a big small truck – 17 and a half feet long, almost 10 feet tall, full time all wheel drive. Powered by a Daimler-Benz diesel, gets about 27mpg in pick-up form.

I wish I had the time to tell you more, but SWMBO* wants to hit the road. Seems there's a shoulder-mounted rocket launcher she heard about down in Portland...

wil

PS Of course not. Happiness is a state of mind. But I'd be the envy of every truck geek you can find...

* She Who Must Be Obeyed – cf. “Rumpole of the Bailey”