MEME: Monday Madness – Shooting Blanks

Upon waking from a tryptophan-induced slumber, Otto was heard to mutter while on her way to the loo: “More fill-in-the-blanks this week! Thank you for playing Monday Madness! (Invite your friends to play along...) Also, check out the featured sites! (over to the right) I thought we'd include a few more... It could be YOU next week! “

1. I've always been afraid of _being severely burned_.
2. People should not talk on cell phones while _driving_.
3. The one thing I look forward to every day is _sleep_.
4. My first meal of the day usually consists of _cereal_.
5. It seems like _doing laundry_ is a never-ending job.
6. The last time I painted a room in my house/apartment was _a long time ago_.
7. The next time I paint, I'd like to paint my _living room_ _a creamy yellow_ .

Well, there you have that for this week. Not terribly exciting and not at all difficult. In fact, the most difficult thing about it is remembering to leave a link to your answers over to Otto's place. Do it. That Plantar Wart on your left heel will clear right up if you do...

MEME

Monday Music Mambo - Week 75

Hello mamboers! I've got another round of musical questions to make you think, dance, and write. I watched the U.K. Music Hall Of Fame ceremony on VH1 last night, so this week's Mambo has a European flavor to it.

1. Who are some of your favorite British bands and artists?

2. Who are some of your favorite Irish, Scottish and Welsh bands and artists?

3. What are some of your favorite songs by the above bands and artists?

4. Are you a mod, a psychadelic, a glam rocker or a punk?

The rules are, there are no rules!!! All you need to do is copy and paste the above questions into your blog and add your responses. After you've finished, return here and leave us a comment so we'll know you've Mamboed. Be sure your Mambo is linked back to http://bdinsanity.blogdrive.com so others can dance too.

Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. If one of the questions doesn't inspire you then simply "pass" it. Just use your imagination and dance like crazy!

My answers:

1. Jethro Tull, The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Dire Straits, Eric Clapton, John Mayall, Elton John, and Pentangle, to name a few from Britain I admire.

2. Sinead O'Connor (she pisses me off, but the wench can sing), Wolfstone, The Chieftains, U2, Enya, Van Morrison, Lenahan.

3. Aqualung, Heavy Horses, Requiem for an Eagle, Sgt. Pepper's LonelyHearts Club Band, Sympathy For The Devil, Sultans of Swing, Money for Nothing, Layla, White Room, Room To Move, Tiny Dancer, Rocket Man, This Train Don't Stop There Anymore, White Dove, So Early In The Spring, No More, Tall Ships, Heart and Soul, Sea Image, O'Sullivan's March, I Will Follow, Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me , Orinoco Flow, The Celts, Brown-Eyed Girl, Lanigan's Ball.

4. I'm a psychadelic, I guess. Actually, I prefer to think of my tastes as eclectic, devolved, pedestrian (all of them, at one time or another).

MEME: Sunday Seven -- Episode 13

Sunday Seven - Episode 13

By Patrick

"Black Friday" is the day after Thanksgiving that indicates to many retailers whether they'll be in the black or in the red after the end of the holiday shopping season. My days of getting up in time for a 5:00am sale are long behind me: I tried that once...and only once. Never again. But from this introduction, you should have at least been able to surmise that this week's question has something to do with holiday shopping. Before the official question, it's time to recognize Donna of " My Country Life ," as the first person to answer last week's question about where you'd be doing most of your shopping this year! Congratulations to Donna! On to the next challenge! THIS WEEK'S QUESTION: Here's your chance to suggest great gift ideas. Take a quick inventory around your home and select up to seven things that you'd hate to be without or that have made your life easier. They can be technological gadgets or unique spins on old mainstays, but they should be things that might just make good gift suggestions for people trying to come up with just the right idea. (You'd probably want to avoid ultra-common things like "computers" and "televisions," which most people would already have, although if there is a specific kind or something unique about the version you have, then it might make a good response.) Either answer the question in a comment (at Patricks Weekender) or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)

1. My automatic.

2. The computers – although they are also horrendous time sucks, too.

3. Shortwave radio – although this is going the way of the dodo bird, the s.w. Can keep me connected to the world when all else is failing – a lesson learned during the two weeks of being iced in.

4. The Coleman stove – beats eating cold canned food when you lose power.

5. The Alladin Lamp – pricey but gives off great light to read and work by, unlike the inexpensive “storm lamps” with only a wick.

6. The car – I'd really hate to walk or ride horses all winter long in Maine

7. The freezer – because frozen food tastes better than canned, all things being equal. And it's a lot less work intensive than canning, too.

There you have it for another week. Be good to yourselves.

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings -- Week 187

Free association is described as a "psychonanalytic procedure in which a person is encouraged to give free rein to his or her thoughts and feelings, verbalizing whatever comes into the mind without monitoring its content." Over time, this technique is supposed to help bring forth repressed thoughts and feelings that the person can then work through to gain a better sense of self.

That's an admirable goal, but for the purposes of this excercise, we're just hoping to have a little fun with the technique. Each week I'll post ten words to which you can respond to with the first thing that comes to mind.

"Rules are, there are no rules." There are no right or wrong answers. Don't limit yourself to one word responses; just say everything that pops into your head. AND you don't have to have your words up on Sunday. Take all week if you want! Read the FAQ for more information.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Week 147

9 hours ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Stuffed:: turkey

2. Armstrong:: Neil

3. Bruise:: ecchymosis

4. Content:: Table

5. Musical:: chairs

6. Assistance:: walker

7. Scrambling:: bouldering

8. Batlle:: Huh?

9. Extended:: contract

10. Discount:: City

Get your own words, post a link to your answers and stick your bubble gum under the table at Patricia's site, that Luna Niña – the crazy chica.

MEME: Saturday Six -- Episode 85

Patrick, having oversome the turkey trots in a timely manner, discovered the following speech on his new roll of Charmin® and decided to share the bounty: “Thanks to all of those who responded to last weeks' first permanent playing of the Saturday Six here in its new home. “For those who'd like to join in on the fun, playing is simple: you can either answer the questions in this journal or you can answer them in your own blog and leave a link. It is strongly recommended that you answer the journals in your blog and post the link...since several of the people who are playing have relocated away from AOL, it's important that everyone knows where your new (or temporary) blogging homes are, so if you don't mind, leave a first name and your journal's link, just so we can find you easier! “You don't have to have relocated away from AOL to play: AOL journal writers are as welcome as ever. “But before the questions, the tradition of the "Saturday Six" is to recognize the first one to play the week before. Meg, of " Friendship, Loyalty and Love " was the first person to play last week. Meg was also a Vivi Award nominee, so be sure to visit her journal. Congratulations, Meg. Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. Enjoy!” 1. Have you ever had a dream that you felt was a message from some "higher power?" Do you think it's possible to receive such messages through dreams? Nope. How do you have messages from nonexistant entities? It's impossible. 2. How much does a person's musical preference tell you about them? A little and a lot. Depends on the individual and when they grew up, their exposures to music when young and how much time and money they had to devote to the arts (viz. survival). 3. What time did you get up Friday morning? Were you part of the shopping madness? I was up early due to the two canine houseguests who live a first shift lifestyle, as opposed to our second shift lifestyle. Still, it beats finding dog poop and pee all over the floors, so I will only grumble a small amount. However, I didn't shop. I hate crowds. Besides, SWMBO worked a split-double and I picked her up at 7AM. 4. Take this quiz: What religion do you fit in with? The quiz said:You fit in with: Atheism Your ideals mostly resemble those of an Atheist. You have very little faith and you are very focused on intellectual endeavors. You value objective proof over intuition or subjective thoughts. You enjoy talking about ideas and tend to have a lot of in depth conversations with people. 80% scientific. 60% reason-oriented.

5. Is the answer you received the religion you feel you really do fit in with? I don't “fit” with any religion. I am not an “atheist” as that implies some sort of organized religion. However, on occasion, particularly after consumption of too much whiskey, I have been known to invoke the Spaghetti Monster. 6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #77 from Globetrotter2: Do you have any special nicknames for your significant other when you're annoyed or irritated with them? If so, give us a few of them (NO PROFANITY, please). “Sweetums.” Enough said... If you have a Reader's Choice question you'd like to see asked (and answered), email it to Patrick! Send it to me and I will invoke the Spaghetti Monster on your hump – and his wrath is awesome to behold!

Look For The Silver Lining

(sung to the tune of "Look For The Union Label" advert.)

Look for the silver lining...
it's the one that you need.
(I said) look for that silver lining,
it's efficacious, indeed:

Keeps out all the spooks and spies,
keeps the Feds from feeding dirty lies,
So, look for the silver lining
in your next foil anti-spy!
(helmet, that is!)

Something I've long suspected -- that genuine sterling silver lining IS needed in your basic aluminum foil anti-spy helmet! Now here's scientific (cough, cough) proof...

"Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We speculate that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason."

Via GruntDoc who cites Instapundit as his source. Read all about it here.

QUIZ: It's all about the pie...

Blatant thievery from silk, who stole it from jeff. I don't care - be it apple crumb, cherry, strawberry or one of the meringues, I haven't met too many pies I didn't like. And as to chocolate, my favorite is Toll House Cookie Pie...

You Are Mud Pie

You're the perfect combo of flavor and depth Those who like you give into their impulses

What Kind of Pie Are You?

Sunday's Video: Sinister Minister

Some of the best mouthharp around plus Bela's inimitable way with the banjo and the title of the tune fits with my feelings about clergy so well ... And So It Goes.

Sinister Minister
By Bela Fleck
CodesAndLyrics.com

Look Mom -- Video!!

Thanks to Becky at Where Life Takes You I can have video on a blog. Is that "kewl" or what?

Go to the site below and search on songs you are interested in -- I got tired of hearing the same thing over and over and over again...


Subterranean Homesick Blues
By Bob Dylan
CodesAndLyrics.com

QUIZ: Sesame Street Character Traits

Blame it on themadhatter. I took the quiz; here's the results. I must have been lying, because I'm a messy mess and not organized at all. Oh well, it isn't like I'm paying for these things...

Guy Smiley You scored 47% Organization, 41% abstract, and 30% extroverted!

This test measured 3 variables. First, this test measured how organized you are. Some muppets like Cookie Monster make big messes, while others like Bert are quite anal about things being clean. Second, this test measured if you prefer a concrete or an abstract viewpoint. For the purposes of this test, concrete people are considered to gravitate more to mathematical and logical approaches, whereas abstract people are more the dreamers and artistic type. Third, this test measured if you are more of an introvert or an extrovert. By definition, an introvert concentrates more on herself and an extrovert focuses more on others. In this test an introvert was somebody that either tends to spend more time alone or thinks more about herself. You are mostly organized, both concrete and abstract, and more introverted. Here is why are you Guy Smiley. You are both mostly organized. You have a good idea where you put things and you probably keep your place reasonably clean. You aren't totally obsessed with neatness though. Guy Smiley is your average Joe. He'll dress up and look nice for his game show, but he's not a neat freak. You are both a concrete and abstract thinker. Guy Smiley uses his imagination to come up with ridiculous game shows. However he's concrete enough to stick by his rules and perform his role as host. You know when to be logical at times, but you also aren't afraid to explore your dreams and desires... within limits of course. You are both introverted. At first glance Guy Smiley may appear to be an extrovert given he hosts a popular show. But in reality he struggles to relate with other people. His prizes tend to just be Guy Smiley merchandise. For whatever reason you are a bit uncomfortable in social settings. You may have one or two people that you are close with. You'd rather do things by yourself and you dislike working in groups where things are always so inefficient. The other possible characters are Oscar the Grouch Bert Snuffleupagus Ernie Elmo Kermit the Frog Grover Cookie Monster Big Bird The Count If you enjoyed this test, I would love the feedback! Also if you want to tell me your favorite Sesame Street character, I can total them up and post them here. Perhaps your choice will win!

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 30% on Organization You scored higher than 30% on concrete-abstra You scored higher than 10% on intro-extrovert

Link: The Your SESAME STREET Persona Test written by greencowsgomoo on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

MEME: Weekend Assignment #87

How Can I Miss You (When You Won't Go Away)
By Dan Hicks

I've talked to your mother and I've talked to your dad,
They say they've tried but it's all in vain.
I've begged and I've pleaded, I even got mad,
Now we must face it, you give me a pain.

     How can I miss you when you won't go away?
     I keep telling you day after day,
     But you won't listen, you always stay and stay,
     How can I miss you when you won't go away?

Your never-ending presence really cramps my style,
I dream that it won't always be the same.
At first I was attracted, but after a while,
Have you ever heard of a "hard to get me?"

Weekend Assignment #87: Musical Conundrums

It's been a tough couple of weeks for John Scalzi, AOL's “Blog-Father.” Through no fault of his own, he's become the magnet for the ire of all disgruntled AOL Journalers incensed by the imposition of banner advertising on their paid journals. Despite it all, he's kept up a chipper countenance. I'd take my hat off to him, but then my bald spot would freeze solid... This week, John was heard to mutter while rolling the dough out for his pecan pie. “I figure most of us are going to be logy and stuffed full of food this weekend, so I'm going to give you all an easy Weekend Assignment: Weekend Assignment #87: Answer one or more of the following musical conundrums: 1. Who let the dogs out? 2. Why do fools fall in love? 3. If birds can fly over the rainbow, why then, oh why, can't I? 4. Do you hear what I hear? 5. How do you solve a problem like Maria? 6. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat? 7. Listen, do you want to know a secret? Do you promise not to tell? 8. How long has this been going on? 9. I want to know, have you ever seen the rain? (Alternately: Why does it always rain on me?) 10. Does anybody really know what time it is? (Yes, you can have silly answers. In fact, I encourage them!) Extra Credit: Pose your own musical question.” Your turn: Answer one of the questions above in your own blog or journal and go to John's AOL-Journal, By The Way, to leave a link. Between us, we shall answer the great musical questions of all time. And what a relief that will be!

Dear John,

I'm glad to hear you received the basket of chestnuts, apples and maple syrup in time for your feast. Nothing like roasting one's chestnuts over the open fire of customer ire, is there? I do hope Ms. Athena didn't find the maple syrup “too sweet,” a common complaint by children when first encountering the “real thing.” They soon get over it and develop the discerning little palates their yuppie parents demand...

I'm going to have to make quick work of the Weekend Assignment this week. Unlike most Yanks¹, we'll be giving thanks and eating roast bird and porcine haunch a la glace on Friday evening. Seems SWMBO² loves that holiday overtime money they pay for working on the three recognized holidays her skin flintish company recognizes: Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. No, such stalwarts as Independence Day, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Veteran's Day, Martin Luther King Day, Columbus Day, Presidents Day – none of those are “holidays” for the purpose of compensation extrordinaire. Forget about such state celebrations like Patriot's Day – not even on the radar. Parsimonious bastards!

Particularly apropos is questionette numero uno, “Who Let The Dogs Out.” Instead of just Willow the Wonder Dog, we have two additional canines in residence. Tucker and Sadie

<--TUCKER & SADIE-->

are here for the weekend while their people spend the holidays with their family up in Canada. I'm an ogre in the eyes of these two – I put them out in the kennel this morning despite the snow and rain, just because I wanted to get a few hours of sleep. It appears that neither has ever spent a whole day outdoors, haven't a clue as to what snow is and, in the case of Sadie, haven't enough sense to get in out of the rain! She must be part turkey! How appropriate, eh? A turkey for T-day.

Anyway, that answers the question. It was intentional. Isn't that amazing?

Now, in the “extra credit” category, I think that old favorite by Dan Hicks and the Hot Licks, “How Can I Miss You (If You Won't Go Away)?” fills the bill nicely. And also covers how I'm feeling about these two spoiled, needy canine guests we're hosting this weekend.

My love to your lovely ladies. Have a great Thanksgiving weekend. Look out for all the lunatic shoppers and their pell mell search for the best bargain. You'll be wishing for my hood-mounted laser cannon if you don't -- And So It Goes...

Wil

¹ “Yanks” are legal residents of the United States of America, as opposed to “Americans” which may be from any of the countries on the continents of North, Central and South America.

² Follow along folks – She Who Must Be Obeyed, ie. the ol' ball and chain, my wife. For historical origin, see “Rumpole of the Bailey.”

And, thanks to Doc Around The Clock, I have this terribly amusing jiveass turkey song to share with you. Cheers!

Food For Thought

Here follows the words of Deogowulf, a Limey pundit and fellow curmudgeon, who turns a phrase way prettier than I will ever manage. Feast now on his thoughts and give thanks he isn't in the mainstream or there'd be a whole lot more dead liberals...

Against what is usually said, it is not the Muslim but the Christian who must adapt to the reality of the Western order, in one way at least; namely in that if he wishes the liberal intelligentsia to pay respect and even obeisance to his religion, he should hold the threat of violence over those who do not; for time and again, our self-styled guardians of thought have shown themselves to be swayed less by argument and righteousness than by violence and power; for they are the quintessence of corrupt intellect and craven character. - Deogowulf.

Happy Thanksgiving! & Quiz...

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

SNAFU

Situation Normal -- All Fucked Up.

It's the Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving. Snow started around 1:00, shortly before I got up. Driving my wife to work about 2:30, the roads were fine, even though I'd had to scrape the snow off the car window. Same on the way home.

Drive Time arrives and the hoi polloi must contend with (insert drum roll and trumpet fanfare) The First Snowstorm Of The Season (enunciated by the Voice of Doom - patent pending). Sadly, it appears that the combination of six months without snow, sunset and the resultant dip in temperature, has resulted in extreme panic in Needle City - they've forgotten how to drive on slippery surfaces.

And thus, we have the parade of hundreds and dundreds (about 1600 per hour, on average) of vehicles creeping along at 10 miles an hour on their way home to their feasts. The turkeys.

I'm just thankful I can watch the flamers make their way home without being amongst them. I've already had one Laser Cannon Moment for today.

QUIZ: Tragic Figures

You scored as Brutus. You have a strong sense of what you believe is right and wrong. You would fight for those ideals to the death - you would even rather betray a close friend than sacrifice those ideals. You believe that reason should overrule passion, and have strong political opinions. Your motivations, however, are not entirely beyond reproach - your personal ambition can occasionally cloud your moral judgement. Brutus 96% Hamlet 79% Macbeth 75% King Lear 67% Othello 46% Romeo 38% Which Shakespearian Tragic Hero Are You? created with QuizFarm.com

via Cynthia.

And Behind Curtain B Is...

Tuesday Two - Episode 7

By Patrick

From Patrick's Weekender blog comes The Tuesday Two. Patrick explained it this way, “Here's the first playing of the Tuesday Two exclusively on Blogger. For those who have never played, the rules are simple: I offer two different questions, both related to the same topic, but you only choose one of them to actually answer. “ “The last edition was two weeks ago. Last week's edition was postponed because of the ad mess over at AOL. But two weeks ago, it was Barbara of " Confessions of An Angel Waitress " who was first to answer the topic of nudity. Congratulations, Barbara!” “Now, onto this week's choice of questions. And remember: don't answer both questions! You'll find out why in December!” THIS WEEK'S TOPIC: THE COURTROOM QUESTION A: “Do you believe the current "jury of one's peers" system is the right way to go, or should local citizens be elected or appointed to serve as "professional jurors" to hear criminal cases, and why.” or QUESTION B: “If a simple, painless and foolproof "lie detector" system could be developed that could be applied to the accused in criminal cases, removing the possibility that an innocent person could possibly be convicted, would you be in favor of that system being used universally in all court cases to determine who is telling the truth, and why?” “For each pair, choose A or B, (indicate which question you're answering!) then either answer the question in a comment or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)” “Remember: choose one or the other in each pair ... not both!”

My Answer to Question B:

Just as video arraignments have become the rule, rather than the exception, up in Aroostook County, Maine, in order to reduce transportation and labor costs and provide more secure conditions for the judge, the accused and others concerned with arraignments, so too should a concentrated effort be made to develop a tamper-proof, fool- and intellectual-proof “lie detection system” to help reduce the enormous expenses associated with the ponderous bureaucracy of the modern court system.

The primary benefits of such technology would be to ease the psychological burden on juries as they judge fellow humans as flawed as themselves. No one wants to incarcerate innocents and most do want to punish the guilty. It's the area of belief in an individual's innocence that bothers most jurors. Take away the fear of wrongful convictions and I think we'd see a vast improvement in the quality of jurisprudence meted out in our civil and criminal courts.

I concede that such a universal system would not be without new problems for “the system.” We lack the space to incarcerate prisoners as it is. Almost all non-violent felonies are pleaded down to house arrest these days. Misdemeanors are almost universally sentenced to probation for various periods sometimes accompanied by monetary retribution. Prosecuting attorneys would of necessity have to find new and better ways of obtaining convictions on the thinnest of circumstantial evidence (although I will note that recent advances in DNA technology have reduced the opportunities for retention of innocents in jail if convicted unfairly on blood or other human biological evidence. Defense attorneys would find it even more difficult conjuring up shadows of “reasonable doubt” to confuse a jury with if the jury could view the results of such an electronic lie detection system for themselves to determine the truth of the matter.

Finally, such a system could well and truly end the seemingly endless appeals process that seem to accompany convicted felons to penitentiary. Tough to argue unfair trial issues that potentially influence a judge and jury of ones peers if the technology allows for no intervention by biased third parties to the process.

But, I could be wrong about all of this. I'm fallible and I tend to prevaricate.

MEME: Sunday Seven - Episode 12

Like the Saturday Six, the Sunday Seven has a new home. Unfortunately, though the questions from the previous eleven weeks will be posted here over the next few weeks, I won't be able to bring all of the old comments...so if you'd like to "replay" a set or if you missed one of the earlier ones, now is your chance!

This Thursday is Thanksgiving Day, which means that this Friday is the first day of the Christmas shopping season. So there's your theme for this week's question.

First, it was Betty of "Of mini-pause and menopause" who was first to play last week. Congratulations to Betty.

So here we go with the first playing on Blogger!

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
Name the top seven stores where you are most likely to do the majority of your Christmas shopping this year. If you can't name seven, name as many up to seven as you can. You can also include online retailers, too.

Either answer the question in a comment or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)

I have to be a little bit careful with this one – on rare occasions the wife and brother actually read this drivel. And SWMBO gets particularly nosy at this time of year. So, in general, I'd shop, if I did shop shop, at the following shops and purveyors of goods retail...

1. Sam's Club

2. The Ski Rack

3. Maine-ly Sports

4. Day's Jewelers

5. The Blue Moose

6. Wally World

7. L.L. Bean

   I can tell you one thing, though. I won't be shopping this weekend. I'll just wait until the next snow storm to get my Christmas shopping done. I HATE crowds. I hate them, I tell you. Hate, hate hate. Bah humbug!

MEME: Saturday Six - Episode 84

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment here, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal so that everyone else can visit! To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. (Again, if you're playing for the first time, please be sure to say so in the comment!) Enjoy!

1. What was the last movie you watched at a theater completely alone? Would you have enjoyed it more or less if you had gone with someone to see it?
Patrick, I really can't remember, it has been so long. In general, I find that sharing movies with other folks of a similar level of intellectual acuity is a pleasure and a frustration, but lots of fun.

2. What was the last non-sexual thing you did around the house completely naked?
Other than sleep (no sleeping clothes between April and November), it was lounge around in sweltering heat after the airconditioner gave up the ghost one late-June day.

3. How well do you know your neighbors? Would you like to know them better or not know them?
I'm definitely NOT a good neighbor. I am, and have been most of my life, a loner. I know the folks across the street by name and have shared a mail box post for nearly 30 years. I look out for their house when they vacation. But, I'm not in their social circle nor am I of the same socio-economic level, so there aren't any neighborhood block parties or that sort of falderol. I know the name of my neighbor to the north but not to the south on my side of the road. Since leaving the fire service, the community I live in is where I come home to sleep – I have no interaction with the town at all.

4. Take this quiz: How much of a conspiracy nut are you?

You are 30% Conspiracy Nut

You are not a conspiracy nut. The government tops your list as the least trustworthy, followed by true conspiracy nuts and weak thinkers! You are into looking behind what you are given and analyzing the propaganda to discover the truth. It's out there.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

5. Of the following "conspiracies" mentioned in that quiz, which single one would you most like the "truth" about and why?

The nonsense about vaccinations that conspiracy theorists latch onto pisses me off royally. It's utter bullshit, and I'd definitely like infallible proof to shut them up, once and for all.

6. If you had to create a slogan that defined your life, what would it be?
Live it now, for tomorrow never comes.

If you have a Reader's Choice question you'd like to see asked (and answered), click the e-mail link on the About Me bar at Patrick's Weekender and send it to him.

READ THIS ENTRY!!!!!

By toonguykc on STROKE RECOGNITION.

His entry says all that needs to be said, so don't just sit there, click that mousie on: READ THIS!!!!!

MEME: Monday Madness -- Direct Questions

As Otto prepares for the US Thanksgiving holiday, she took time to say, " It's that time of the week again! Enjoy! =)"

1. I have little or no patience when it comes to _idiocy_.
2. I wish I could spend more time _reading_.
3. The most productive thing I accomplished this past weekend was _cooking dinner_.
4. The most enjoyable thing I did this weekend was _attending the Eastern Maine Model Railroad Club Show on Saturday_.
5. I've always wanted to learn how to _sky-dive_.
6. If money wasn't an issue, I'd buy _an H-1 Hummer_.
7. I blog because _it is easier than writing the books I should be working on_.

You can play along, too. Visit Otto's Monday Madness web site, scarf a copy of the questions for your own use and leave a link to your answers in the comments at her site. That big crack between your toes will heal if you do...

Have a great week and be safe if you and the family are traveling to Grandma's, or to the familial home or even to Philadelphia. Just be safe, y'all.

What If?

Suppose you are a regional, Canadian oil supplier Irving Oil Company, trying to increase your market share in the US?

Suppose you hired an ultra-hip advertising agency in Saint John, eh? And gave them free rein, eh?

Do you suppose they'd produce these off-the-wall adverts for your new TV campaign in the States?

With sled dog drag races and chipmunk engines, eh?

Be sure to bring your broadband connection or something to read on dial-up (War and Peace might be good) to make the video download painless.

Eh!?

Band Name Generator

Your Band Name is:

Anal Floss Rejects

Band Name Generator

via infinite pink

MEME: Monday Madness -- "M" Words

Otto uttered, “It's been a while since we've done this; I ask each of you to choose a letter of the alphabet and answer each of the following with a word/group of words that begins with the letter you've chosen... And as always, thanks for playing! =)”

1. Name one color.
2. Name one song.
3. Name one movie.
4. Name one vehicle.
5. Name one food.
6. Name one household item.
7. Name one book.

I chose “M”. Then I immediately regretted it. An “M” color? Finally, the brain cells shifted, the synapses fired and I had it, Mauve. The came the song, sung by the Mamas and the Papas named “Monday, Monday.” I'm on a roll here... “M” movies... hmm, I own both Michael and Monsters, Inc. Mercedes is my “M” vehicle of choice. Mushrooms are probably my most favorite “M” food. An “M” household item, how's about a magazine, or Maalox, or perhaps, money. Finally, there's the “M” book. I'm sure there are millions. Their titles escaped me for the longest time. Then, in a flash, I had it. “Murder, Inc.” Which is what I'm going to do when I get a hold of Otto...

You can play along with the Monday Madness foolishness by visiting Otto at her web site and snagging a set of questions for yourself. It's fun and that bunion you've been nursing will disappear in a flash. Leave a link to your answers in the comments there, while you're at it.

MEME: Sunday Seven -- Episode 11

Sunday Seven - Episode 11

Ever thought of changing careers? This week's "Sunday Seven" will show you the Top 25 jobs for 2005, as defined by Fast Company. What makes a top job? That would mean different things to different people, but Fast Company used several different methods to compile a list of the top 25 jobs, including job growth, salary potential, education level, and room for innovation. Before the official question, it's time to recognize Kelly of "In My Opinion, and Yes I have an opinion on EVERYTHING," another Vivi Award nominee, as the first person to answer last week's question about Thanksgiving Dinner! Congratulations to Kelly! Get ready to start dreaming about alternate career choices. Here we go: THIS WEEK'S QUESTION: Of the Top 25 Jobs for 2005, list, in order, the seven jobs you'd least like to have, with #1 being the job you think you'd absolutely hate the most. All seven should be jobs you wouldn't want. Either answer the question in a comment or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)

1. Chicken plucker – I lasted for just a day at the poultry factory when I was 16. My job involved taking the chickens out of their crates and breaking their necks – the next fellow hung them on hooks and removed their heads. It was gruesome...

2. Hog Farmer – today's mechanized “factory farm” operation just sucks the hairy wazoo...

3. Sardine Factory worker responsible for disposing of the “gurry”

4. Medical Health Services Manager

5. Security Sales Analyst – in fact, there isn't a sales job in the world I'd want

6. Advertising & Promotions Manager

7. Actuary

8. Agent and business manager of any sort of celebrities – they all suck.

9. Athlete

10. Personal Finance Adviser

    What? You say I didn't follow the directions? So? Wanna make something out of it? I threw the first three in to see if you were paying attention.

    You can play, too, if you care to. Just stop by the Meme-Meister Patrick's Lair and he'll fix you right up. Even has them fancy comment thingies so's you can leave a link to your very own answers. And did you know, Patrick has a special formula for eliminating jock itch? It's true ... just ask him.

Great Site for Images

Visit the PPS Image Collection. You'll be glad you did!

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings -- Week 145

Week 145

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Mighty:: Mouse

2. Gotta find time to ....:: sleep

3. Statistic:: lies

4. Midnight:: magic

5. Thaw:: frozen

6. Hips:: fanny

7. Reader:: Rabbit; Cantor?

8. Related:: kin

9. Brilliant:: fraud

10. Posture:: poor

    Get your own words and leave a link to your answers over at La Luna Niña's place. Even the boils on your arse will dry up and disappear if you do.

MEME: Saturday Six -- Episode 83

Saturday Six - Episode 83

Patrick was heard to utter thusly, “Me? Miss a "Saturday Six?" Never! It's been a spectacularly long week. And add to that the fact that I've actually been working on these questions off and on all day. I've changed a few, then changed them back, then changed them again. I hope you like what I finally came up with!

But before the questions, it's time to recognize the first person to play last week. That honor went to Jim, of "skelligrants," who was the first person to leave a link to the specific entry in which he answered the questions. Congratulations, Jim.

To those who aren't sure how to add the address of the specific entry, it's easy: once you've posted that entry in your journal, go to the bottom of that entry, click the "Link to this entry" hyperlink, then when that page loads, simply copy the address that appears in your browser window. In addition to the normal web address, right after your journal's name, it will say "/entries/" and a number. That whole URL is the web address to the specific entry in your journal.

And I don't think there were any first-timers last week. If there were, they didn't say so, so let me know if I missed someone!”

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment @Patrick's Place, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal there so that everyone else can visit! If you don't have an AOL journal, you can still play, but of course you'll at least need an AOL screen name, which you can get for free with AOL Instant Messenger, to be able to leave a comment. To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. (Again, if you're playing for the first time, please be sure to say so in the comment!) Enjoy!

1. You are invited to spend a night, alone, in a large house that is believed to be haunted. A close friend of yours whom you trust tells you of his or her own experience, and you have sufficient reason to believe that there may be a genuine haunting going on there. Without promise of any kind of reward for staying the night, would you agree to do so?

Sure.

2. What do you most enjoy about your job?

   The variety of the challenges that came my way each day.

3. Who was the last person you had a conversation with? My wife. What was the main topic of the conversation? The “other” woman; it was prompted by the Adam Sandler/Paz Vega movie “Spanglish.”

4. Take this quiz: What kind of "smart" are you?

All-Around Smart

You are all-around smart. Essentially, that means that you are a good combination of your own knowledge and experience, along with having learned through instruction - and you are equally as good with theoretical things as you are with real-world, applied things. You have a well-rounded brain.

20% theoretical intelligence
40% learned intelligence

5. What was the last food that you totally ruined -- to the point that it was inedible -- when trying to cook?

A steak – not only was it burned to a crisp but the fat in the pan dripped onto the oven window as I attempted to remove it from the broiler, causing the oven window to explode!

We ate hot dogs and beans that night...

6. STRANGELY-OBSCURE QUESTION #1: If you had to do over again, would you change anything?
Absolutely. Many, many things. And yes, in reply to the corollary to that question, I have many regrets.
If you have a Reader's Choice question you'd like to see asked (and answered), click the e-mail link on the About Me bar @Patrick's Place and send it to me.

Tempest In A Pisspot!

Also known as a "thunder mug," a "pisspot" inhabited every sleeping chamber in the house before the advent of indoor plumbing (according to my Great Grandfather Albert, as relayed by the VERY PROPER Grandmother Grace, "It is barbaric to shit in the house!" Nuff said on that subject). Anyway, this entry has nothing to do with plumbing and everything to do with patents and muddled thinking.

According to this UPI report, the folks down to the US Patent Office must have gotten a good deal on some really good stuff -- they've issued patent number 6,960,975 for an anti-gravity device.

Yes Virginia, in the same week that the State of Kansas decides to require the teaching of "creationism" in the secondary school science curriculum, the loons at the USPO grant a patent on a device that defies the laws of physics. You may now officially bend over and kiss your ass goodbye.



via Pharyngula

MEME: Weekend Assignment #85

Weekend Assignment #85: Magazines, Anyone?

After taxing your brains a bit with last week's assignment, I thought we'd do a pretty easy this week, with a subject that came to me as I was sorting out my recycling: Weekend Assignment #85: What magazines do you subscribe to and why? This assumes you currently subscribe to a magazine or two, of course, but I'm reasonably confident most of us do. If you don't have any current subscriptions, however, you can list some of your most recent subscriptions or magazines you want to subscribe to. Extra Credit: What was your first magazine subscription?

Dear John,

What a nosy fellow! Magazine subscriptions ... who'd of thought you were “curious inky”? As it happens, I currently have only two magazine subscriptions.

Sea Kayaker: I got this for xmas from the wife last year, after requesting same for three years running. It's focus is on the less frenzied form of kayaking, sea or coastal kayaking, gear reviews and my favorite, the Monday Morning Quarterbacking of fatal accidents for lessons to be learned. Ghoulish, perhaps, but there is nothing better than learning from others' mistakes with the aim to avoid repetition. Short of getting out there yourself and forgetting your dry suit in a full gale, learning by the death of a fellow paddler is probably the next most memorable method of indoctrination in the basics that spell the difference between life and death.

Sleep Review: This is a trade publication with a primary focus on growing your sleep lab practice. It's secondary focus is on methods and materials of relieving the various ills those with sleep illnesses are prone (heheh – pun intended) to experiencing. A little something my dead brother signed me up for that keeps coming and coming.

Yankee: This is actually the property of SWMBO and woe betide me if I mess around with the latest issue before she does! Death is threatened, I tell you. Death!

While I (we) have subscribed to many magazines over the years, those are the ones we're currently subscribed to. I wouldn't be surprised, if asked again a year from now, to report an entirely different magazine mix or, perhaps, none at all if the economy worsens...

Give our best to the women who own you and strive to have a happy Thanksgiving and a jolly good xmas time.

Wil

PS. This Boy's Life was my first subscription. It was a folio sized monthly with an emphasis on Boy Scouting, I think. Childhood memories are deep in the past and often subject to sloppy seconds in the recall department, so don't hold me to any of that info, if you please.

For those of you seeing this for the first time, AOL's blogfather and resident science fiction author, John M Scalzi, posts a question each week to get the creative juices flowing. Think of it as “Writers Block Antidote” and proceed accordingly. All John asks of you in return is a link in the comments at his blog, By The Way back to your answer. That's not too difficult nor time-consuming, is it? Besides, you know that carbuncle on the back of your head? It will fall off the next time you fall asleep if you do as requested...

This Is Veterans Day

Veterans Day, 2005

November 2, 2005

A Proclamation by the President of the United States of America

Americans owe a great debt of gratitude to those who have sacrificed for our liberty and for the security of our Nation. We express deep appreciation to our veterans -- the men and women who stepped forward when America needed them, triumphed over brutal enemies, liberated continents, and answered the prayers of millions around the globe.

From the beaches of Normandy and the snows of Korea to the mountains of Afghanistan and the deserts of Iraq, our courageous veterans have sacrificed so that Americans and others could live in freedom. As we mark the 60th anniversary of the end of World War II this year, we remember the millions of veterans who crossed oceans and defeated two of the most ruthless military forces the world has ever known. The freedom that the children and grandchildren of these veterans now enjoy is a monument to their fallen comrades and the generations of patriots who have served our country.

Through their commitment to freedom, America 's veterans have lifted millions of lives and made our country and the world more secure. They have demonstrated to us that freedom is the mightiest force on Earth. We resolve that their sacrifices will always be remembered by a grateful Nation.

With respect for and in recognition of the contributions our service men and women have made to the cause of peace and freedom around the world, the Congress has provided (5 U.S.C. 6103(a)) that November 11 of each year shall be set aside as a legal public holiday to honor veterans.

NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BUSH, President of the United States of America, do hereby proclaim November 11, 2005, as Veterans Day and urge all Americans to observe November 6 through November 12, 2005, as National Veterans Awareness Week. I urge all Americans to recognize the valor and sacrifice of our veterans through ceremonies and prayers. I call upon Federal, State, and local officials to display the flag of the United States and to encourage and participate in patriotic activities in their communities. I invite civic and fraternal organizations, places of worship, schools, businesses, unions, and the media to support this national observance with commemorative expressions and programs.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this second day of November, in the year of our Lord two thousand five, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and thirtieth.

GEORGE W. BUSH

MEME" Tuesday Two: Live Nude Girls!!!

Tuesday Two - Episode 6

THIS WEEK'S TOPIC: NUDITY

QUESTION A:
You are invited to a party at a nudist colony through a program that seeks to introduce the concept to people who aren't already members. You know the following things going in: 1) There'll be nothing "inappropriate" going on, 2) You won't know anyone who is there, and 3) You'll never again see any of the people who are present for the rest of your life. Given these conditions, would you attend?

or

QUESTION B:
While housesitting for a close friend, you discover some nude photos of your friend that were left out in the open, and apparently completely by accident. Would you look at the photos, and would you tell your friend that you found them?

For each pair, choose A or B, (indicate which question you're answering!) then either answer the question in a comment or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)

Remember: choose one or the other in each pair...not both!

After careful consideration, this week it'll be Question B, because no one in her right mind wants to see an obese troll swinging his hotdog and beans around the volley ball court...

First off, I haven't an answer ... only questions. Is it a male or a female friend's house you are taking care of? Were the photos left out as a form of invitation to fantasize about said friend? There are “accidents” and then there are “accidents,” if you follow my drift. So, being a nosy son of a bitch, I'd look at them. If they were artful enough, I might even prepare a written critique. If sufficiently salacious to ignite my libido, I might be moved to write an erotic poem or short story to accompany one or all. And finally, I return to the first question and ask another. Does it matter to me what sex my friend is?

Yes, I would probably talk with my friend about the photos, let them know what I did with them or where I put them for safe keeping (while housesitting, it is considered very bad form to invite others over to the house, but sometimes folks do drop by). And if I were single, well ... we'd have to wait and see what my friend's answer was to the second question above.

You can obtain your own copy of this week's question, leave a link in the comments to your own answer and read the answers of others in the comments over at Patrick's Place. Who knows ... if you work it just right, you might be able to get one of Patrick's dogs to lick your feet!

MEME: Monday Madness - Blankity Blanks

Monday, November 07, 2005

Otto says: “I apologize for not having these posted earlier; I have no internet at my home... But I hope you don't give up on me! This week we'll fill in the blanks. Thanks for playing!” =)

1. Sometimes I wish I could just _scream_.
2. If I could take a long weekend to _Cape Cod_, I'd be very happy.
3. The world would be a better place if more people would just _chill_.
4. One of my greatest qualities is _irony_.
5. The one thing about me that I need to work on is _tolerating lower life forms like lawyers, newspaper reporters, politicians and christians_.
6. Happiness is _a warm puppy_.

You, too, can be a Monday Madness fill-in-the blanks instant pundit! Just swing on by the Monday Madness web site, copy the questions, sign up for the email notification list or leave a link to your answers in the comments box over there. That awful itching will disappear if you do, too!

MEME: Unconcious Mutterings – Week 144

Free association is described as a "psychonanalytic procedure in which a person is encouraged to give free rein to his or her thoughts and feelings, verbalizing whatever comes into the mind without monitoring its content." Over time, this technique is supposed to help bring forth repressed thoughts and feelings that the person can then work through to gain a better sense of self.

That's an admirable goal, but for the purposes of this excercise, we're just hoping to have a little fun with the technique. Each week I'll post ten words to which you can respond to with the first thing that comes to mind.

"Rules are, there are no rules." There are no right or wrong answers. Don't limit yourself to one word responses; just say everything that pops into your head. AND you don't have to have your words up on Sunday. Take all week if you want! Read the FAQ for more information.

Sunday, November 06, 2005
1 day, 2 hours, 24 minutes ago

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Deeper and deeper::oil well
   
2. Can’t help ...::loving you (bloody earworms!)
   
3. Devil’s advocate::Mephisto
   
4. Superpower::passé concept
   
5. Threatening::storm
6. Played::duped
7. War::Peace
8. Violate::probation
9. Invest::funds
10. Choke::cherry

You can join the notification mailing list, get a list of the current words, post a link to your answers in the comments and check out other's answers by visiting that crazy chica, La Luna Niña. Your fleas will succumb to the vapors if you do, too.

Sunday Seven -- Episode 10

Sunday Seven - Episode 10

Now that it's November, Thanksgiving will soon be upon us. The great feast held by the Pilgrims back in 1621, which is commonly referred to as the "First Thanksgiving," was really the only Thanksgiving most of them celebrated; there was no official annual celebration at that time.

Thanksgiving Day became an official American holiday after Abraham Lincoln set it on the last Thursday of November in a proclamation of 1863. Later, Franklin D. Roosevelt would change it to specifically the fourth Thursday of November.

Regardless of the early history of the holiday, for most families, there are definite traditions when it comes to the menu for the big day.

8<>8

Now, it's time to set aside your fear of the dark and things that go bump in the night, unloosen your belt one more notch, and get into the spirit of Thanksgiving...dinner!

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
Name seven foods that you wouldn't consider your Thanksgiving dinner complete without.

Either answer the question in a comment @Patrick's Place or answer it in your journal and include the link in a comment over there. (To be considered "first to play," a link must be to the specific entry in which you answered the question.)

Well, my Thanksgiving dinners should always include a shrimp appetizer, turkey with dressing, fresh garlic mashed potatoes, pureed pumpkin or squash, peas or a green bean casserole, Parker rolls, and real venison mince pie (when I can get it) or an apple crumb pie a la mode.

However, lately I've been happy with a Lean Cuisine Turkey Dinner...

MEME: Saturday Six -- Episode 82

Saturday Six - Episode 82

Tonight is the big night for the announcement of the winners of this year's Vivi Awards. But today is Saturday, which means that there's no better day of the week for the Saturday Six.

But before the questions, it's time to recognize the first person to play last week. That honor went to Mort, of "Mortimer's Cafe," Congratulations, Mort.

Also, we welcome those who played the Saturday Six for the first time last week: Leslie, Scrletwoman, Hoppers, MyHeartSaysSo2 and Susan, whose link didn't appear to work. Be sure to stop by their journals to say hello.

Here are this week's "Saturday Six" questions. Either answer the questions in a comment @ Patrick's Place, or put the answers in an entry on your journal...but either way, leave a link to your journal @ Patrick's Place so that everyone else can visit! If you don't have an AOL journal, you can still play, but of course you'll at least need an AOL screen name, which you can get for free with AOL Instant Messenger, to be able to leave a comment here. To be counted as "first to play," you must be the first player to either answer the questions in a comment or to provide a complete link to the specific entry in your journal in which you answer the questions. A link to your journal in general cannot count. (Again, if you're playing for the first time, please be sure to say so in the comment!) Enjoy!

1. What is the last big "gift" you bought for yourself...either for your birthday, Christmas, or any other holiday?

I really can't recall. I suspect it was this computer because, even though my wife bought it for us as our Christmas present last year, she detests this computer with a passionate hatred – she misses the old computer lots and lots... this one has WindozeXP, don't ya know... so she claims that I bought it to torment her!

2. Of the official Vivi Award Categories, if you had to nix one of them, which would you choose?

Sorry, I can't think of a single one. Lots of additions come to mind, though ... see below.

3. Which category would you add that isn't on the list this year?

I think the VIVI's, if continued, have the potential to grow willy-nilly, much as the Academy of Motion Pictures Awards (the Oscars) have grown. So, for now, I suggest we add the category of Best Model Railroading Journal. Just because...

4. Take this quiz: Which soap opera does your life most resemble?

Your life most resembles: The Young and the Restless Your life mostly resembles those of the characters on the Young and the Restless. You are not very melodramatic, and your life is pretty normal. What makes you cool is that you can turn the ordinary into the extraordinary.
Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

5. Have you ever heard a song and thought, "Whoever wrote that must know me?" If so, what song was it, and do you still feel that way?

   Nope. While I have identified with the characters in songs in the past, I can not recall ever jumping to the conclusion that the song was about me... except one that Carly sang, what was it called?

   6. If your birthday had to fall on a holiday each year, which holiday would you choose and why? (For this question, assume that holidays like "Thanksgiving," which fall on a different date each year, would fall on the same date to accommodate the question.)

   I suppose I'd choose the Fourth of July. I'm partial to fireworks being shot off in my honor...
   
   If you have a Reader's Choice question you'd like to see asked (and answered), click the e-mail link on the About Me bar @Patrick's Place and send it to him.