1. What song gives you the most holiday cheer? Jethro Tull's The Christmas Song does the trick for me:
Once in royal David's city, stood a lonely cattle shed,
Where a mother held her baby.
You'd do well to remember the things he later said.
When you're stuffing yourselves at the Christmas parties,
You'll just laugh when I tell you to take a running jump.
You're missing the point I'm sure does not need making
That Christmas Spirit is not what you drink.
So how can you laugh when your own mother's hungry?
And how can you smile, when the reasons for smiling are wrong?
And, if I just messed up your thoughtless pleasures,
Remember, if you wish, this is just a Christmas song.
(Hey! Santa! Pass us that bottle, will you? )
2. Who is the hardest person to shop for on your holiday list? My wife. I join the legions of Lost Men wandering the department stores at the local mall, listlessly fingering merchandise, totally unable to arrive at a buying decision when confronted with the need to by her a Christmas gift. Everyone else I'm a “Captain of Industry”, forthright, decisive, impatient; able to formulate a buying strategy and execute same with a minimum of time wasted, with no fuss nor bother. Tell me to get a gift for my wife and I'm a first grader, sucking my thumb, utterly hopeless. It's infuriating!
3. When do you start your holiday shopping? Christmas Eve at noon. Any sooner results in SWMBO either discovering the gift, me blurting out the information and having to make a new purchase or “buyer's remorse” resulting in a return and “wash, rinse, repeat” of the process.
4. What food or drink do you love when it's cold out? (Recipes and recommendations, please!) Hot Chocolate (SwissMiss Milk Chocolate with marshmallows), a “Hot Toddy” of Coffee and Bourbon or Irish Whiskey, French Onion Soup made from an Ox-Tail broth and lots of sweet Vadahlia onions. Roast Beef with Yorkshire Pudding.
5. What do you do to get rid of a cold or flu? I send the little rugrats home to their parents...
You, too, can join in the Monday Madness! Just visit Mistress Otto's Monday Madness Boutique of Horror and Pain and snag some questions for yourself.
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